Some say that sports play an important role in the development of society. Others think it is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The popularity of
sports
has increased in our modern
society
. While it is considered an important tool to bring
development
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
, a different view holds that
sports
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
just a leisure
activity
.
This
essay will throw light on both these perspectives,
although
in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
physical
games
play a key role in the
development
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
. A healthy
society
signifies a developed
society
and physical
activities
play a significant role in ensuring a healthy
society
. In modern times, due to increased job pressure, many young people are experiencing a lack of energy in their daily
activities
. Under
such
scenario
Correct article usage
a scenario
show examples
, participating in outdoor
actvities
Correct your spelling
activities
is an alternative to help the youths to feel more
energitic
Correct your spelling
energetic
and lively. Those individuals can better perform in their work environment and bring about more innovations and developments.
An
Change the article
A
show examples
multinational company,
for instance
, once reported that employees who indulge in physical
activities
perform better than those who do not.
These
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
consolidates
Change the verb form
consolidate
show examples
our view that
sports
can lead to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
overall
socitial
Correct your spelling
societal
social
development
, highlighting that
health
Correct article usage
the health
show examples
of the youth influences the health of the country.
Sports
,
however
,
encounters
Change the verb form
encounter
show examples
a negative review from a section of people. They believe that it is nothing more than a free
time
activity
. The positives of the
games
are neglected by that population section, who states that the critical
time
lost while participating in
such
events has more
repurcations
Correct your spelling
reputations
reputation
. Considering the fact that today's job requires long term involvement,
sports
should be considered a free
time
activity
.
For instance
, one CEO highlighted the fact that because employees tend to
Correct your spelling
overindulge
show examples
over indulge
Correct your spelling
overindulge
show examples
in outdoor
activities
, the company is losing precious work hours.
This
opinion, though cannot be neglected,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
fails to consider the benefits of outdoor
games
. To conclude, different views are held by
various
Add an article
a various
show examples
section
Fix the agreement mistake
sections
show examples
of the people regarding the utility of these physical
games
, but
sports
as a medium of
socitial
Correct your spelling
societal
social
development
cannot be ignored. While
sports
is a leisure
activity
, to diminish its status as only a free
time
activity
is far fetched.
Submitted by biswasnirmalya161 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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