IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Some people say that health care and education should be the responsibility of the government but others think that it is the responsibility of the individuals themselves. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #health #care #education #responsibility #government #individuals
Specific individuals believe that public
services
such
 as healthcare and the educational system must be funded and operated by the state.
In contrast
, others have felt that meeting these needs must be the responsibility of public members. I strongly disagree with the latter statement. I think that it should be the mandate of the
government
 to fund and administrate the public
services
. On the one hand, the opponents of
this
 idea argue that
government
 expenditure on public health and general education is a burden on the taxpayer money that does not offer significant payoffs. Since the costs associated with these infrastructures are paid for from the public coffer, they believe that
this
 money can be used for other purposes.
For example
, investing in the tourism sector, which can lead to the creation of jobs and thereby lowering unemployment rates.
On the other hand
, those advocating the
government
's role in providing these
services
, believe that some people do not have the financial resources to fulfil these necessities.
For instance
, If the
government
 has no involvement in providing primary education, many low-income families would not be able to educate their children, resulting in an increase in the illiteracy rate in the country.
Furthermore
, as most public schools are subsidized,
this
 will be particularly helpful In conclusion, having considered both sides of the argument, I am fully convinced that the state should be in charge of essential
services
 like health and education.
However
, I
also
 believe that individuals must have the freedom to chose whether to attend private or public
services
.
Submitted by poryamo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: