There are severe social consequences to housing shortages in cities and only the government can solve this problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#consequences #shortages #cities #government

At present, several countries have a serious social problem about a lack of residence in

city

towns, and they believe only the administration can improve it. As

this

Change preposition

for this

show examples

statement, I totally agree with it because the

government

can operate the policy to expand jobs to rural areas, and They can develop countrysides to

Add a missing verb

be more

show examples

convenient to live in.

Firstly

, one of the reasons why I agree is the administration can operate the policy to the extent

Remove the article

apply

show examples

employment

Change preposition

apply

show examples

outside the

cities

. Japanese's

government

, for

exaple

Correct your spelling

example

, they are able to stop a huge number of people to

move

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show examples

the

cities

. Because they reduce the tax imposed on the companies which are relocated in the rural areas.

Therefore

, many

factor

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factors

show examples

move

out

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apply

show examples

outside the

cities

. From

this

result, young generation

have

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has

show examples

the job in their hometown.

Moreover

Add a comma

,Moreover

show examples

they do not need to

move

into the capital

city

. It can decrease the issue

about

Change preposition

show examples

housing shortages.

Secondly

, to reduce

Correct article usage

the

show examples

lack of

home

Fix the agreement mistake

homes

show examples

, the

government

can solve

this

trouble by increasing facilities for more

convenient

Replace the word

convenience

show examples

countrysides

Correct article usage

the countrysides

show examples

. Based on my country, a large number of people relocate to the capital

city

which is Bangkok because they require

Remove the article

apply

show examples

ease of transport. The

government

solve

this

issue by increasing public transportations

such

as buses, local taxies, subway and so on. From

this

result, people who desire to

move

into Bangkok change their

mind

Fix the agreement mistake

minds

show examples

so, a lack of housing in

city

Add an article

the city

show examples

is lesser than before. In conclusion, the trouble of home shortages in the downtown can be improved by only the

government

. In my opinion, I absolutely agree with it because they can operate the policy to extend the employment to rural areas, and they can develop outside the

cities

Add a missing verb

be more

show examples

convenient.

Submitted by ramonthapat on Tue Aug 17 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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There are severe social consequences to housing shortages in cities and only the government can solve this problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many people think that museums and art galleries should only show work from local artists rather than work from other countries. To what extent do you agree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

1 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? A teacher's ability to relate well with students is more important than the ability to give knowledge.

Some think that private companies should pay for cleaning up pollution, while others say it is the government’s responsibility. Discuss and state your own opinion.

Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, whereas others think celebrities make the problem less important. Discuss both sides.

Police in some countries like England don't carry guns. Some people don't approve of this because they think that police with guns gives them security. Others think that police carrying guns decreases crimes. What is your opinion? Give relevant examples and experiences.