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Writing Samples
Band 7

With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?

#improvements #today’s #health #care #society #people #numbers
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In today's modern era, health care has been showing significant improvement.
As a result
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, the number of elderly people has been increasing as well, which means society has to put more attention to them. In
this
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 essay, we will discuss
this
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 in detail and will draw an inference of the management of
this
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 cause. The increased life expectancy of any country will burden their economy and development. To be more precise, as an individual's earning capability will be stopped at an age of 65 on average, he will be considered under a senior citizen category to reap the financial benefits from the government. To illustrate, a study by Harvard University states that significant growth of 60% in the older population and a 50% decline in birth rate has been noticed in developed
countries
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, resulting in the scarcity of workers required at jobs in these
countries
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. Having said that, it is evident that society will not be able to cope up with
this
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 increase gradually, as
this
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 will result in a collapse of the working force in these nations.
Although
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 the increase in elderly people and the decline in the birth rate are unavoidable in some
countries
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, I believe that there is a solution for
this
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 concern.
Firstly
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, The government can grant scholarships for international students to study in their country.
However
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, the scholarship recipients should spend few years working for that country.
Secondly
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, the government can invite immigrants from other nations that could match their gap.
Furthermore
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, they should offer permanent residencies and citizenships to their immigrants and scholarship recipients. I think that these initiatives are able to solve
such
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 issues effectively.
Nonetheless
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,
this
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 gives an opportunity for the global workforce to become a part of their association, which
otherwise
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 probably were not satisfied with their former jobs and educations. In conclusion, the inflation in the older generation is becoming a challenge for some nations, yet, these
countries
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 have come up with great dynamics by inviting younger potential workforce from other
countries
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 to become their integrated part. I believe that
this
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 is true globalization, where we respect people,
moreover
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, the opportunities are extended globally to generate a healthy workforce, without disturbing our elderly blessings. More effective ways need to be introduced to make
this
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 work.
Submitted by ayurizeki on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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