Some people believe that parents have a great influence on the children’s growth but influence from the outside plays a more important role. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people hold the view that
children
's development, physically and mentally, is influenced mostly by their
parents
. Meanwhile, others hold a belief that influences from outside factors contribute to a greater extent. Judging on a detailed analysis of both sides, I think each side is extremely significant in the process of a child’s growth. It must be admitted that, from prehistoric times,
parents
’ influences have had substantial impacts on their
children
long before any school or education systems have been established.
Parents
are considered the
first
caretaker of a child until they are mature enough to participate in school or kindergarten. They are responsible for teaching them basic skills
such
as walking, eating or how to behave and get used to personal hygiene practices.
This
creates a stable bond and strengthens the relationship which is a foundation for
parents
’ influences. Through their early stages of development,
children
tend to copy what they saw and repeated it.
Therefore
,
parents
play a pivotal role in guiding the formation of their
children
’s characteristics and thoughts by their lifestyles and routines.
On the other hand
,
that is
not to say that
parents
are the only factor that affects
children
’s growth as when their
children
reach a certain age, they would mostly spend their time outside which significantly affect the way they develop. Teachers and other classmates will be novel factors that are comprised in their social hub.
This
requires these little boys and girls to adapt and adjust themselves as the way others treat them will be different from their
parents
. In the long-term,
this
might help establish social manners and especially sharpen their communication and collaboration skills. Teachers are
also
educationists that are well-trained and equipped with specialized qualifications.
This
, in turn, prepares them with the abilities in giving lessons that directly provide crucial knowledge for kids and ways to handle difficult and underperform
children
. All in all, (it is hard to jump to an absolute decision on whether
parents
or outside factors made substantial contributions to a child’s growth. Be that as it may,) considering two perspectives, I believe that a balanced combination of the merits of both sides should be emphasized for a child’s all-round development.
Submitted by yentho.nguyengiang on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: