Some people argue that giving severe punishments for driving offences are crucial to reduce traffic accidents while others believe that other measures should be taken in order to improve the road safety. In my opinion, I wholeheartedly claim that serious penalties are more reasonable solutions to reduce this trend than having better measures.

#people #punishments #offences #traffic #accidents #measures #road #safety #penalties #trend

Some

people

argue that giving severe punishments for driving offences are crucial to reducing

traffic

accidents

while others believe that other

measures

should be taken in order to improve road safety. In my opinion, I wholeheartedly claim that serious penalties are more reasonable solutions to reduce

this

trend than having better

measures

. On the one hand, it is true that having strong punishments like fines, cancelling licenses and locking up drivers who break serious

rules

in the cells can decrease the number of

accidents

. For

this

reason,

People

might not voluntarily follow the

regulations

and would break them if possible.

For instance

, in

Singapore

Add a comma

,Singapore

show examples

the

rules

for driving cars are highly severe by the government.

Moreover

, they make their citizens pay a lot of fines or putting them into jail at once if they have

accidents

, which they thought those kinds of

accidents

rigorous.

As a result

, their country security systems for

traffic

accidents

are at a low level.

Besides

, the drivers will become more disciplined and alert.

On the other hand

, other

measures

are essential in maintaining

traffic

rules

and

regulations

Furthermore

, they can give drivers significant educations about

traffic

accidents

, as well as

rules

and

regulations

when driving. Those can ameliorate the drivers’ knowledge.

Nevertheless

, it will be boring if it is only taught without any demonstration. To exemplify, Myanmar, which is included in one of the south-east Asian countries, lacks severe

rules

and

regulations

Hence

, most

people

in that country disobey them when it comes to real situations;

consequently

, some

people

have less knowledge about driving

measures

for some reason.

Thus

, the rate of

accidents

has increased. By and large, it is undeniable that improving from both sides can lead to great results. I personally believe that giving punishments is more beneficial than other means.

Submitted by Shwe Yamin on Fri Aug 27 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

298 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You have recently purchased a piece of furniture, but you noticed a problem when it was delivered to you. Write a letter to the store manager and say what is the problem? how did it happen in your opinion? What do you suggest the manager should do to resolve the problem?

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