Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangered species while others think it is a waste of valuable money. What is your opinion?

#people #money #species #waste

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Some species across the globe are on the verge of extinction due to changes in their habitats

such

as global warming and deforestation. In many countries, a controversy between whether it is worth

to invest

Change the verb form

investing

show examples

in maintaining those endangered

animals

or not have arisen. I wholeheartedly agree that we, as fellow inhabitants, should shoulder the responsibility to prevent the disappearance of other creatures.

This

essay will

further

elucidate why certain living things are crucial to be protected.

Firstly

, the existence of some endangered

animals

represents their local countries.

For instance

, it is widely known that pandas, one of the species that exist only in a small quantity, can be found only in their native country, China. With pandas

also

being one of the dominant factors contributing

tourism

Change preposition

to tourism

show examples

, authorities have taken serious initiatives to protect and breed them.

Therefore

, other governments should follow

this

notion and must not be hesitant to invest in saving them.

Secondly

, it is only fair and ethical for people to create a livable environment for

animals

approaching extinction to thrive again because the culprits behind severe climate change resulting in endangerment

Change the verb form

are

show examples

no other than humans. Men not only create cars and vehicles that produce pollution but

also

cut down thousands of acres of woods to built residences.

Therefore

, they should own the consequences of their actions and support in defending the disappearance of certain species. To sum up, certain

animals

are the symbols for some countries and civilization created harsh conditions for them to survive.

Therefore

, spending on creating an adequate environment for

animals

remaining in small quantities would not be a meaningless use of money. Failure to protect them would bring the nation’s stand in the world downhill.

Submitted by chitsundi on Sun Aug 29 2021

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangered species while others think it is a waste of valuable money. What is your opinion?

In some countires, many young people choose to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting universitiy studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

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Some people think the typical teaching of a teacher and students in the class will not exist by the year 2050. Do you agree or disagree?