The number of TV programs is growing day by day. Some people say that it is good as it gives people more choices, while others say it affects the quality of TV programs. Discuss both and give your opinion.

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As
population
Add an article
the population

The noun phrase population seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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is growing up there is no doubt demand
of
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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TV programs or
show
Fix the agreement mistake
shows

It seems that show may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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is increasing.
As a result
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

day by
day
Add a comma
,day

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase As a result day by day. Consider adding a comma.

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plenty of channels with
varities
Correct your spelling
varieties

The word varities is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

of shows are introducing. Some people believe that it is good so they can
chooes
Correct your spelling
choose

The word chooes is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

their favourite series as others are
opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay will analyse the good and bad sides of
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

and will give my personal views at the end.
First
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of all, getting a choice to choose favourite
programe
Correct your spelling
programme
program

The word programe is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

has
immenes
Correct your spelling
immense

The word immenes is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

advantage in person's life.
As
Change preposition
An

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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an individuals
Correct the article-noun agreement
an individual
individuals

The indefinite article an may not be required with the plural noun individuals in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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can enhance knowledge by watching his/her preferable shows.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, a person who is
intrested
Correct your spelling
interested

The word intrested is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

in
art
Add an article
the art

The noun phrase art seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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can watch only an
art related
Add a hyphen
art-related

It appears that art related is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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programe
Correct your spelling
programme
program

The word programe is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

and could get the
oppourtunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities

The word oppourtunities is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

to learn related his/her area of
intrest
Correct your spelling
interest

The word intrest is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

from different sources.
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Correct your spelling
Furthermore
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Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore

The word Further more seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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, because of technology people can watch
same
Correct article usage
the same

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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drama or movies in
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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different languages which
boardcast
Correct your spelling
broadcast

The word boardcast is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

from different channels
as a result
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they do not have to quit their movies just because of languages barriers.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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