IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people are working longer and longer hours. What are the reasons and effects?

#people #hours #effects
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Working longer
hours
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 is a growing tendency in society nowadays. The primary cause of
this
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 change is excessive workloads and the effects on one’s health and quality of life are decidedly detrimental. The need to
work
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 additional
hours
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 often stems from increasing demand in the workplace. To keep up with the competition in an increasingly globalised marketplace, employees are expected to assume a high volume of
work
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, often with inadequate staff levels and support.
This
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 has resulted in employees having to
work
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 extra
hours
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 to compensate, which is exemplified clearly in IT-related sectors. A program developer in Vietnam generally spends an average of 10
hours
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 at
work
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 per day integrating complicated software systems, which would not be necessary if he was accompanied by a colleague. Extra office
hours
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 can adversely affect workers’ health, as well as their personal lives.
First
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 of all, working overtime can lead to a lack of sufficient rest, a decrease in energy and eventually health conditions in extreme cases.
This
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 is illustrated in research conducted in Japanese white-collar workers, who have to sit in their offices for up to 14
hours
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, resulting in spinal injuries, arthritis and increased risk of strokes.
In addition
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, as more time is spent at
work
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, workers necessarily have less time for their loved ones, which can weaken bonds between family members and friends.
As a result
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,
this
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 can generate a feeling of general dissatisfaction in individuals, potentially becoming a catalyst for stress and depression in the long run. In conclusion, extended working
hours
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 are associated with increasing demands in the workplace, preventing employees from leading a healthy and balanced life.
Therefore
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, I believe governments should enact laws that impose weekly overtime standards for corporations.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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