Even though governments have worked hard to bring about improvements in the health care system , the overall standard of physical health in developed countries is decreasing. What are the potential reasons for this and what are the some the long-trrm effects?

#governments #improvements #health #care #system #countries #long-trrm #effects

It is undeniable that the

health

care

system

is one of the most important criteria to determine the development of one country.

However

, especially in developed countries, the better

this

system

is, the more the general standard of physical

health

declines.

This

essay will discuss the potential causes and predict some long-term effects that the decrease in general

health

might have on a country. The most reasonable explanation for

this

issue is that many people nowadays are reckless when it comes to their physical

health

. Since the development of technologies, human lives have become far more convenient compared to their ancestors, which will harbour the trend of a sedentary lifestyle.

For instance

, while the elder generations have to pick up the broom to clean their houses, the youth only need to turn on the cleaning machine in order to live in a nice and knit house,

thus

, it will discourage young people to exercise or have physical activities. Another factor that might affect

this

problem is the dependence on the

health

care

system

habitants

Correct your spelling

habitats

show examples

. It is unrefutable that the medical

system

of most countries has been significantly improved for the

last

few decades. Despite the benefits that it brings to the community, it might cause the tendency of entirely relying on

this

system

of society,

therefore

, lead people to a less active lifestyle. If

this

trend continues to grow in the future, there will be two possible outcomes that ignite from the decline of public

health

Firstly

, it will severely affect the quality of the national workforce.

Secondly

, it may lead to an unstable status in society. Because of the degeneration of general

health

, public presses or

habitants

Correct your spelling

habitats

show examples

will start questioning the effectiveness of the national medical

system

hence

, it will decrease the public support for the current government. In conclusion, a sedentary lifestyle and the tendency of relying on the medical

system

are two main factors that lead to the decline in general

health

Submitted by manhtienng.01 on Sun Sep 05 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

326 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Even though governments have worked hard to bring about improvements in the health care system , the overall standard of physical health in developed countries is decreasing. What are the potential reasons for this and what are the some the long-trrm effects?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Most agree that we should be training children to recycle waste to preserve the Earth’s natural resources. However, some believe that it is parents who should teach their children to recycle waste while others feels schools are more responsible. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Example 6: Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the punishment. Why are this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

If financially possible, is it always better for young people to leave home and be independent at the age of 18, do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience. Discuss both views and give your opinion.