Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programs #charity #neighborhood #sports #children

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Nowadays,

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apply

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an increasing number of people argue that volunteer service should be promoted to

students

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in secondary

school

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. While I agree free-charged

work

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should be seen as irrelevant for many high

school

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students

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, I believe that

students

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need to take volunteer hours during

school

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To begin

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with, it is widely acknowledged that

students

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, especially those in

senior-high

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senior high

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schools, should pay more attention to their

study

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studies

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For example

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students

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who can gain an outstanding academic performance usually spend numerous time on learning, which means they don't have sufficient time for unpaid community service, including student tutors or house

cares

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care

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Conversely

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, if they attend

this

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kind of job, they might

loss

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lose

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valuable time and even can not concentrate for their intensive senior

school

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years.

Subsequently

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, some of them may

can't

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pass the examination.

Moreover

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, some

students

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might have their own jobs and are paid by their employers already.

Therefore

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, they are not willing to take the

work

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without perks. Notwithstanding,

students

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should take

the

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apply

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responsibility as citizens in society. It is of utmost importance for them to take the

first

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step into society by volunteering in local communities.

Furthermore

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,it is an opportunity for

school

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-aged people to enjoy rich experiences from

such

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services. Another point is that some secondary schools and universities require

students

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to finish a couple of hours of voluntary

work

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in high

school

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before graduation or becoming a freshman.

Thus

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, unpaid voluntary

work

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has

became

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become

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apply

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necessary

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necessity

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for

students

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. In conclusion, I agree that community

work

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is not the most important part for high

school

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students

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, yet I still support the proposal that it should be introduced as a compulsory sector to high

school

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students

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, contributory factor is that it can raise

the

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awareness of

students

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' social responsibility.

Submitted by vincentchenyj on Mon Sep 06 2021

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

compulsory
unpaid community service
charity
neighborhood improvement
teaching sports
empathy
social justice
transferable skills
teamwork
leadership
problem-solving
civic duty
civic engagement
educational enhancement
practical experiences
academic learning
real-world applications
social cohesion
mutual support
time management
balancing priorities

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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Because of the rising cost of living, many young people are increasingly being forced to live with their parents into their 30's. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people put their personal information online (address, telephone number,...) for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Many old buildings protected by law are part of a nation’s history. Some people think they should be knocked down and replaced by new ones. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.