In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extant do you think this is a positive trend?

#people #hobby #trend

It is undeniable that many humans at the present are often thinking that shopping is a

hobby

due to there can make them happy from working hard

Change preposition

apply

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each day, but

people

in the past think that shopping was

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routine residential work. From my point of view, I think that

this

development can offer both positive trend and negative trend. In the following paragraph, the reasons to support my opinion will be outlined in the detail. In my opinion, I think that shopping is a

hobby

of modern

people

because many

people

are working hard, nowadays, they will feel good and comfortable when they walk slowly in the big shopping mall after they finish their work.

Additionally

, everyone in the modern city can easily access shopping than in the past because many technologies are developed,

such

as they can buy many goods from

the

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online shopping without going outside their home or their company. While humans from the old days must go

the

Change preposition

to the

show examples

shopping mall only when they want to buy something, and going to these shops was difficult in the past due to the transportation has not been developed as much as today.

As a result

people

at the present time are frequently thinking that shopping is their

hobby

or activity rather than

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apply

show examples

routine housework.

However

, I think that the easy accessibility of shopping of modern

people

can cause

the

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apply

show examples

negative behaviour,

for instance

, they will not feel relax if they cannot buy something, and when they go to the store, they will feel that they need to buy somethings to take home,

although

they do not need to buy it. In conclusion, I strongly think that

this

improvement can offer positive and negative

trend

Fix the agreement mistake

trends

show examples

Therefore

, it is recommended that it is not wrong to think that shopping is a

hobby

due to hobbies are whatever makes them happy.

Submitted by kitsanayuiyui on Wed Sep 08 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

consumerism
retail therapy
materialism
disposable income
economic growth
financial instability
environmental impact
social interaction
community building
emotional satisfaction
advertising influence
shopping habits

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In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extant do you think this is a positive trend?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Eating sweet foods produces acid in the mouth, which can cause tooth decay. (High acid levels are measured by low pH values) Describe the information below and discuss the implications for dental health. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You should write at least 150 words.

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of these situations outweigh the disadvantages?

Some of the methods used in advertising are unethical and unacceptable in today’s society. To what extent do you agree with this view?