The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to intoduce more physical education lessons in the school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is an undeniable fact that owing to an increasing trend of eating junk food, the problems regarding well being are increasing. it is often argued that the best way to deal with

this

problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the school

curriculum

however

I firmly agree with the given notion. Apparently, fitness-related problems are increasing at an alarming rate.

Such

issues are putting a strain on the health care system.

This

issue can be solved by giving proper awareness regarding physical education and adding it to the institute

curriculum

. By using

this

long term approach students will be compelled to adopt healthy activities. Most of the children will be motivated by

this

act and adopt daily exercise to remain fit.

Furthermore

, the introduction of physical discipline lesson not only motivate students but their parents as well and they will take part of healthy activities to set an example for their children.

In addition

, these activities will be part of their

life

In addition

, in my boarding ,academy it was mandated to do daily exercise, Now

this

activity is necessary for my

life

and it keeps me fit and help me to keep my weight in a reasonable range. Habits adopted at the early age of

life

will continue till later

life

so it must be mandatory in the school

curriculum

. To recapitulate, the increasing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the fitness care system. To solve

this

issue many believe that physical education lessons must be introduced in the school

curriculum

. I completely agree with the statement

Submitted by fysl.iqbal on Fri Sep 10 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were more suitable and livable for people in those time than they are now. What problems will this cause ? What can be done to solve these problems ?

Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

To learn effecrively, children need to eat a healthy meal at school. How true is this statement? Whose responsibility is it to provide food for school children?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problem are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or an negative development?