Some people say that when deciding how taxes should be spent, governments should prioritise health care. Other people believe that there are more important priorities for taxpayers' money. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

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People have different
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
regarding how states should use their funds. Some would argue that spending on
health
care should be given priority,
while
others say that there are other sectors that should be given more importance.
This
essay would argue that
although
health
is important, there are other
things
that are more significant,
such
as
education
and development.
To begin
, there is a group who believes that when
budget
Add an article
the budget
show examples
is decided,
health
care should be
prioritize
Wrong verb form
prioritised
show examples
.
That is
because personal
health
is one of the most important
things
, and if a person is sick, he or she cannot be productive.
Moreover
,
health-care
Correct your spelling
health care
show examples
is expensive, and
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
of people are unable to pay their medical bills. So they believe that government should provide
health-care
Correct your spelling
health care
show examples
.
For example
, in
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
NHS spending is more than 100 billion dollars annually.
However
, money
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
on
this
sector can be used for children's
education
and countries' development.
On the other hand
, there are others who think that
states
Fix the agreement mistake
state
show examples
resources are limited and other
things
in life are
also
important. Governments should
also
focus
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
limited funds on
education
and development as well. If they
will
Verb problem
do
show examples
not do that, they will be left behind
other
Change preposition
by other
show examples
nations. The money can
also
spend
Wrong verb form
be spent
show examples
on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
welfare projects for
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
as well.
For instance
, Norway
spend
Change the verb form
spends
show examples
around 11% of its annual budget on
education
, which
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
made
possible
Correct pronoun usage
it possible
show examples
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
university-
Correct your spelling
education
show examples
education
to be free, and
this
has allowed its citizens to focus on other
things
in life. In conclusion,
although
health
is important, there are other important
things
as well, which governments should focus on. It is important that all the sectors are given importance.
Submitted by saadanwer89 on

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task response
Your essay presents a balanced discussion on the topic, addressing both views and presenting your own opinion. However, ensure that each point is developed with more depth and detail.
task response
The examples provided are relevant, but try to include more specific data or personal experiences to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has a clear structure, aim to improve the logical flow between your paragraphs. Connecting sentences or phrases could help enhance the coherence of the arguments presented.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences could be more clearly connected to the main points. Consider using linking words or phrases to guide readers through your arguments more effectively.
coherence cohesion
You successfully include an introduction and a conclusion in your essay, which frames your discussion well.
task response
The essay covers the key aspects of both views on the topic, indicating an understanding of the subject matter.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Fundamental need
  • 2. Economic growth and development
  • 3. Workforce productivity
  • 4. Preventive health care
  • 5. Cost-effective
  • 6. Long-term outcomes
  • 7. Health disparities
  • 8. Social equity
  • 9. Socioeconomic status
  • 10. Vulnerable populations
  • 11. Infrastructure
  • 12. Quality of life
  • 13. Knowledgeable workforce
  • 14. Economic propellers
  • 15. Balanced approach
  • 16. Diverse allocation
  • 17. Societal development
  • 18. Robust economic performance
  • 19. Public funds
  • 20. Health system burden
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