Some people argue that holding sporting events is beneficial to countries’ development. However, other people hold the opposite opinion. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #events #countries’ #development

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Sport

is one of the most crucial parts of people's lives. Some people are firm believers in the benefit of

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

events. Others,

however

, have shown intense devotion to the opposite opinions.

This

essay will examine both points of view and will show my opinion. The

first

and most obvious benefit is making to be famed. A good example of

this

is Tokyo Olympic 2021 held in Japan.

This

world-famous sports

event

show the spotlight to Japan which they can show their cultures and innovations throughout

this

event

. As the result, the potential can be seen from many national companies so they can make decisions

easily

Replace the word

easier

show examples

to invest in

this

country. Despite being several benefits,

sport

event

also

has numerous drawbacks. The potential of which is that the financial system will be fallen if that

event

is not successful. According to academic research, it indicates that Japan invests more than billions

yen

Change preposition

of yen

show examples

this

Olympics for their facilities

such

as new infrastructures and utilities.

However

, many citizens protest for

this

investment because, in

this

situation, the government ought to focus on the Covid pandemic more than Olympic.

Consequently

, the government might not have enough money to deal with pandemics leading to detrimental country development. In conclusion, if a question about a

sport

Change the verb form

sporting

show examples

event

is addressed, it would be hard for us to make a decision on

this

controversial issue because they are many advantages and disadvantages. In my opinion, the benefit of

sport

outweighs the negative effect because it can make the nation be unity so it can make people helping each other to pass through any problems that could occur

then

the country can be developed.

Submitted by sahapol.rs on Sun Sep 12 2021

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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Some people believe that the government should spend more money putting in more works of art like paintings and statues in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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