Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people,however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#governments #progress #people #country

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These days, economic advancement has become the most crucial achievement for

governments

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around the world.

However

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, some

people

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believe that other developments are the same important and

governments

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should

considered

Change the verb form

be considered

show examples

them as well. In

this

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essay, I will discuss both sides and present my own view. Economic development has various benefits for a

country

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First

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of all, it improves

livelihood

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the livelihood

show examples

people

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. If

economy

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the economy

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grows significantly, it will decrease

unemployment

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the unemployment

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rate. Most citizens are likely to have a job and become more wealthy.

For example

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, many studies in Thailand show that economic growth is directly connected to

average

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the average

an average

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income of

people

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, especially for small-medium businesses.

Moreover

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, it reduces

crime

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the crime

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rate in a

country

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. When

people

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have their own income, they might not do illegal activities to gain money.

Therefore

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, it will develop

Remove the article

apply

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safety in societies.

For instance

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, it is widely accepted that the crime rate in developing countries is far higher than the number in developed countries. One of the main reasons is that

people

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have to break a law for

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the survivor

a survivor

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survivor

Replace the word

survival

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On the other hand

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, there are other improvements

are

Correct pronoun usage

that are

show examples

also

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important for a

country

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. One of

main

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the main

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developments might be public health care. To explain, citizens should be provided free accessible health services.

Furthermore

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governments

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should consider educational development for children. It not only expands

life

Correct article usage

the life

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expectancy of

people

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but

also

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provides more skilled workforces for a

country

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. To

illustate

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illustrate

, many experts claim that investment in human resources, especially in young

people

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, is the most worth.

This

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is because they will grow up to

propell

Correct your spelling

propel

economic growth in the long term. In conclusion,

although

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economic improvement has a variety of advantages, other areas of

developments

Fix the agreement mistake

development

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such

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as healthcare and education are

also

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equally important. From my view, I totally agree that

governments

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should parallel develop all goals that might be better for a

country

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in the future.

Submitted by molwan_tae on Tue Sep 14 2021

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

310 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

standard of living
sustainable development
social equality
environmental degradation
cultural heritage
technological innovation
wealth disparity
human development index
holistic approach
quality of life
economic prosperity
healthcare system
education system
cultural diversity
policy decisions

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Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people,however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that zoos where animals are kept in man-made environment should no longer exist in the 21st century. Do you agree or disagree?

It is inevitable that traditional cultures will be lost as technology develops. Technology and traditional cultures are incompatible. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Nowadays, traffic is a serious problem in big cities. Why this is so and what effects does it bring?

Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartment building? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

Nowadays more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause?What are the solutions?