Some people think the increasing business and cultural contact between countries bring many positive effects. Other say it causes the loss of national identities. Discuss both side and give your opinion.

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In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

contemporary era due to globalisation, businesses and cultures easily share among
countries
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. A number of people opine that the increased field and cultural contact between
countries
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give a positive result, whereas other deemed that its harm national identities.
this
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essay intends to analyse both perspectives before
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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give my opinion. I,
however
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with the former side. On the one hand, there are two main reasons why people believe in the former view.
firstly
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, due to improved relationships in form of the trade sector and knowledge of culture gives strong bonding and trust, lead to bright future for
countries
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Secondly
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, Not only investment and employment but
also
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economic improvement happen, as a consequence, overall growth of
countries
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

has accelerated.
For instance
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, research states that after globalisation the 30% of improvement seen in cultural transformation worldwide, After all, these are viable reasons we can not keep away.
On the other hand
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, it believed latter view by some that, they give following reasons, The main reason is a fundamental effect seen in national identity owing to cultural and trade activity by other
countries
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. the youth of particular nation influence by another country and try to apply their life,
as a result
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they forgot nationalism and awareness of civilization.
Furthermore
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, Not only the possibility of being distracted by unknown trade strategies but
also
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the flow of information increased to succeeding generation which impact on future as well.
However
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, as far as
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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am concern, national status plays a vital role for future generations, despite the fact that how much positive effect is done by globalisation.
For example
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, Taiwan continuously loses their integrity due to over intervention by china in the form of business and civilization, at the
,
Remove the comma
apply

There should be no comma after the article the in your sentence. Remove the comma.

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end china want to amalgamation with it. In recapitulation, it can be reiterated that
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma after the subordinating conjunction although. Consider removing the comma.

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there can be a wide range of growth in economic, business and culture, the country can not ignore their harm to national identities

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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