Some countries are considering imposing curfews in which teenagers will not be allowed outdoors at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this policy?
These days,
wether
to enact Correct your spelling
whether
Fix the agreement mistake
legislation
legislations
restricting adolescents’ presence in public at Correct your spelling
legislation
night
without supervision
of guardians or not is the major controversial issue. Despite the fact that Add an article
the supervision
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
people
have Change preposition
of people
Add an article
an objection
objection
against Fix the agreement mistake
objections
this
policy, I firmly support this
.
The primary reason behind my viewpoint is that adopting the policy in which teenagers are not allowed to Add a missing verb
be presence
presence
in public places during the Replace the word
present
night
, can reduce the crime rates among them. To be more precise, the occurrence of illegal activities such
as assaulting, street fighting, drug abusing
or alcohol drinking among youth is more frequent, Add a hyphen
drug-abusing
thus
, this
law can avert them from such
troublemaking. This
is proven by the statistics which stated that during the pandemic period the figure for the crime rate among young
generation witnessed a Correct article usage
the young
considerably
decline. Change the adverb
considerable
That is
why,
embracing Remove the comma
apply
aforementioned
policy is highly advisable.
Another reason Correct article usage
the aforementioned
of
why I support Change preposition
apply
this
legislation is that it can decrease the number of young victims
. To be more clearer, it is precise that criminals often do their illegal activities such
as murder, kidnapping or sexual assaulting and teenagers are highly likely to be their victims
as they are more vulnerable. Visiting public places with the supervision of adults or staying at home at night
, the probability of occurring such
incidents could be declined accordingly
. The survey from statistics showed that the number of young victims
are
lower in countries where Change the verb form
is
night
curfews are adopted than those where freedom among teenagers are
prior. Change the verb form
is
Thus
, putting these teenager-related law restrictions into practice is a valuable concept.
In conclusion, I strongly believe if governments impose curfews regarding youth’s allowance-related restrictions to go outdoors without accompanying adults there would be considerable
decline in both the crime rate and Add an article
a considerable
victims
among young
generation.Add an article
the young
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite