In some culture children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

There are different culture and in every
culture
Add a comma
,culture
show examples
people have own specialities and qualities. As there are few things that we should educate our children from childhood and guide and motivate them that they can do anything in their life if they do hard
work
. Now
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
day kids are
self motivated
Add a hyphen
self-motivated
show examples
and
goal oriented
Add a hyphen
goal-oriented
show examples
they know what to do in their life is they really understand the real meaning of hard
work
,
therefore
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
early age
gardians
Correct your spelling
guardians
should communicate and provide
then
Correct your spelling
them
show examples
proper knowledge of hard
work
, the real hard
work
is for everyone even for whom they are studying in school and even in kindergarten
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
if
this
thought projected in their mind that things and target in life always easy if they do
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
and without dedication
discipline
Add a comma
,discipline
show examples
it cannot
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
archive
.
Secondly
Add a comma
,Secondly
show examples
I
Correct your spelling
think
show examples
thing
Correct your spelling
think
show examples
this
kind of guidance is required in
early
Add an article
the early
show examples
age of kids, because during that time only they will come to know the real importance of time. And
only
Change the article
the only
show examples
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
is not enough to
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
something there are
difference
Replace the word
different
show examples
patterns and formulas that are adopted by very famous and great people,
such
as Dr APJ
abdul
Change the capitalization
Abdul
show examples
Kalam (former president of India) , Dr K
sivan
Change the capitalization
Sivan
show examples
(Director Isro). The said people did hard
work
but in
proper
Add an article
the proper
show examples
direction and with
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
attitude, Success is like
a
Change the article
an
show examples
ice burg and like ice burg, which we can see small part out of
water
Add an article
the water
show examples
but the main and bigger part no one can see that in water,
therefore
with hard
work
some other key features is
also
required and I do not see any disadvantages of
this
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
I personally think we should propel our kids and should turn around the har
work
.
Submitted by reshmachavhan31 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • persistence
  • resilience
  • self-esteem
  • confidence
  • motivation
  • disappointment
  • frustration
  • unrealistic expectations
  • talent
  • opportunity
  • socio-economic conditions
  • success
  • failure
  • learning process
  • valuable lessons
  • pressure
  • stress
  • anxiety
  • fear of failure
  • mental health
What to do next:
Look at other essays: