IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

People aim to achieve balance between their work and lives. But few people achieve it.

#people #aim #balance #work #lives
There is absolutely no doubt that in the 21st century , it is quite difficult to adjust their lives and occupation.
However
 , many citizens are trying to balance between their
job
 and resides and some of the individuals are successful in it. The prime hurdles people face is too much workload .
One
 possible solution would be
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
proper
time
 management.
To begin
 with, there is
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
one
 obvious reason why few people cannot balance between their
work
 and their lives.
Firstly
, Nowadays, in most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
organisations or industries, employers have to
work
 10-12 hours and it is compulsory for them. Due to the hectic
job
, too much pressure and workload on them so they cannot live happily as well as they cannot spend their quality
time
 with friends and family.
As a result
, few citizens are unable to adjust their
life
 with
Add an article
a job
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
.
for instance
, According to Harward University stated, 50% of IT recruiters lived far from their residence so they did not enjoy their
life
 with colleagues and loved
one
's because they have to only focus
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their
work
life
. Some solutions could be adopted in order to avoid
such
 a situation.Some individuals are aware
about
Change the preposition
of
show examples
 how to manage their
work
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
life
 and prosperous
life
. If people want to live happily , they make proper
time
 management between their living
life
 and
job
life
.
Moreover
 , they have to give some quality
time
 to their loved
one
's because it is our
aspects
Fix the agreement mistake
aspect
show examples
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
 so if you are pleased
then
 you can automatically concentrate on
work
also
.
For example
, Rakesh jhunjhunwala
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 well-known trader in the share market and he works for 6 hours. After his
job
 , he
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 some activities as well as live
entertainment
Correct article usage
an entertainment
show examples
life
. To recapitulate, it is clearly
problem
Add an article
a problem
the problem
show examples
 of
such
 complexity in
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
 era that no solution is likely in short term.
However
, the prime hurdle is too much amount of
work
 and
this
 issue is tackled by
time
 management
Submitted by mulchand.sen16 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Work-life balance: the equilibrium between one's job responsibilities and personal life.
  • Overwork: working too hard or for excessive amounts of time.
  • Remote work: working from a location other than the central work office, often from home.
  • Flexible working hours: work hours that are adaptable to suit an employee's needs.
  • Commuting: traveling between one's home and workplace.
  • Digital technology: electronic tools and systems used to generate, store, and process data, often leading to increased connectivity.
  • Disconnect: to detach from technology or work communications, often to establish boundaries.
  • Time management: the ability to use one's time effectively or productively.
  • Prioritize: to determine the order for dealing with tasks according to their importance.
  • Employer support: programs or practices employed by an organization to assist employees in managing work and personal roles.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: