IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Governments should spend more money on medical research and less on researching the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In recent days ,there is a debate regarding that in which
research
Use synonyms
 authorities should spend
money
Use synonyms
.some people tend to believe that
government
Use synonyms
 should use more
money
Use synonyms
 for health
research
Use synonyms
 and reduce the amount spend
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 environmental
research
Use synonyms
.
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 partially agree with
this
Linking Words
 reason the reasons I will explain the forthcoming paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, due to various reasons I have supported
this
Linking Words
 statement.
Firstly
Linking Words
,nowadays innovation of technologies and
life styles
Correct your spelling
lifestyles
show examples
 lead to many health issues
therefore
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should focus utilize more
money
Use synonyms
 for medical
research
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 for new diseases
have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
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 been increasing day by day .For evidence,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these epidemic period
Change the determiner
this epidemic period
these epidemic periods
show examples
 shows that the necessity of advancement in
hospital
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
sector
Use synonyms
 so scientists would find new medicines and
vaccine
Fix the agreement mistake
vaccines
show examples
 to overcome
this
Linking Words
 situation and more technologies require in
medical
Add an article
the medical
show examples
sector
Use synonyms
 to make new searches.
Secondly
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,medical
sector
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 gives more revenue to the
government
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 so if
government
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 use
money
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 in these
sector
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 for them
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 asset they could utilize these amount for other infrastructures.
However
Linking Words
,
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government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should not avoid
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental
research
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. In recent days, environmental issues have been increasing so the necessities to find the problems in
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
 is essential.
For example
Linking Words
,in 2018 fire happened in
amazon
Correct article usage
the amazon
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 forest which
depics
Correct your spelling
depicts
depict
 the lack of to find environmental issues.
moreover
Linking Words
,natural
disaster
Fix the agreement mistake
disasters
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 enormously
affect
Change the verb form
affects
show examples
 the revenue of the countries so its
legislations
Correct article usage
the legislations
show examples
 responsibility to protect them. To conclude, they are myriad
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
reasons why
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should spend more
money
Use synonyms
 on health
sector
Use synonyms
research
Use synonyms
however
Linking Words
 the necessity of environmental
reasech
Correct your spelling
research
 could not avoid.it is predicting, in
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
government
Use synonyms
 should acquire enough
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
 to spend these two
researches
Change the wording
types of research
pieces of research
kinds of research
show examples
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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