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Writing Samples
Band 8.5

Some people say that individuals who make a lot of money are the most successful. Others think that those who contribute to society like scientists and teachers are more successful. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Although
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 some people believe that affluent individuals are much more successful than other people with professions like teachers and scientists, others have a different opinion about
this
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 assumption. The
success
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, which can be considered the result of personal and professional actions, can be measured in diverse ways.
This
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 essay will discuss both sides and I will explain my opinion in detail. On the one hand, in the present day with the advance of globalization, the idea of having
success
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 is increasingly more required among young workers since being a known
person
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 for their efforts in
work
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 is highly rewarding. On the one hand, workers
such
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 as scientists and teachers are incredibly essential and of paramount importance to society due to the results of their
work
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, doing research, and transmitting knowledge, but at the same time they are not valued in front of society.
For example
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, nowadays teachers need to
work
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 with a double workload in an overwhelming schedule, without cutting-edge equipment to make a reliable salary, and even so, they do not have the true acknowledgement. For these reasons, as far as I am concerned they are not more successful than wealthy people. On the flip side, in a fast-paced world, those that make
money
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, independently of studies are much more rewarded,
in other words
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,
money
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 is a signal of
success
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.
Furthermore
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, loaded individuals can have a life much easier and comfortable;
therefore
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, having a fortune can be considered a substantial step to
success
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.
For instance
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, a
person
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 with
money
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 has more opportunities not only to travel and know different cultures but
also
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 to invest in their studies and their interpersonal skills which leads to being a
person
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 much more eligible to
work
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 in any large company around the world, resulting in a life of
success
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. The more the value of a bank account, the more chances to have a prosperous life. For these reasons, I concur with the idea about individuals who make a lot of
money
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 are the most successful. In conclusion,
money
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 should not be the only fact to size up the prosperity of a human yet unfortunately in current society, it is considered a vital tool to measure how important a
person
Use synonyms
 is.
This
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 essay discoursed two distinct sides and I could explain my point of view.

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial prosperity
  • capitalizing
  • luxury travel
  • exclusive experiences
  • contributions to society
  • humanitarian workers
  • lasting impact
  • highly subjective
  • cultural, societal, and personal values
  • comfort and security
  • deeper personal satisfaction
  • holistic understanding
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