The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #control #amount #violence #films #television #decrease #crimes #society

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Violent

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

media

Use synonyms

have been seen

Change preposition

as an

show examples

association with an increasing crime rate in society. To reduce the related criminality, some

people

Use synonyms

advocate that governments should strive to minimise the

violence

Use synonyms

showing on mass

media

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, I totally agree with

this

Linking Words

statement and

this

Linking Words

essay will explain the rationale behind and why it is the government side should take the

responsibilities

Fix the agreement mistake

responsibility

show examples

. Research indicated that

Remove the article

apply

show examples

excessive exposure to

media

Use synonyms

violence

Use synonyms

has a detrimental effect on viewers leading to their aggressive behaviours in society. Some films containing

violence

Use synonyms

convey a shared message that it will not be punished if

people

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utilise

violence

Use synonyms

to solve problems.

This

Linking Words

may result in

people

Use synonyms

imitate those offensive behaviours in

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

real life.

In particular

Linking Words

, those

people

Use synonyms

who have issues

Change preposition

with

show examples

emotion regulation, anti-social personality or impulse control are more likely to being affected after watching violent materials. Being occupied by those negative emotions, they may become agitated or angry easily when they have arguments with others. They may end up fighting

people

Use synonyms

and being involved in legal issues. In a word, restrictions on violent

products

Use synonyms

may reduce the trigger of

people

Use synonyms

’s aggressive mindset. Having sufficient resources, authorities are capable of halting the spread of violent

products

Use synonyms

media

Use synonyms

more thoroughly.

First

Linking Words

of all, governments can exercise power to restrict the production of violent

products

Use synonyms

from legislation, putting pressure on production companies. If

media

Use synonyms

platforms understand that inappropriately disseminating

violence

Use synonyms

audience

Fix the agreement mistake

audiences

show examples

may cause legal penalties, they will be more cautious when

classify

Change the verb form

classifying

show examples

those materials.

For example

Linking Words

, they may limit teenagers from accessing violent games so potentially it may reduce crime occurring among

this

Linking Words

cohort.

Secondly

Linking Words

, top-down regulations from authorities can be state-wide.

Instead

Linking Words

of efforts from individual

media

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in one area,

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

can allocate more finance and human resource to ensure the banning of violent

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

can be enforced in all regions, from well-known

media

Use synonyms

companies in major cities to less-known counterparts in rural areas. To sum up, the reduction of violent

products

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may lead to

lower

Correct article usage

a lower

show examples

crime rate in society, and

this

Linking Words

can be achieved by local governments in a more effective way.

Submitted by bruceinau on Wed Sep 22 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

352 words

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The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development?

Million of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the government should not put money on building theatres and sports stadiums. They should spend more money on medical care and education. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that the experience children have before they go to school will have the greatest effect on their future life. Others argue that experiences gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your opinions.