Some people think that government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #government #rise #obesity #children

Currently, it is

ofen

Correct your spelling

often

considered that the

governement

Correct your spelling

government

has a

resposibility

Correct your spelling

responsibility

for the fact that

children

suffer from obesity. I completely agree with

this

statement and I will explain my opinion in more detail in

this

essay. One of the

reason

Change to a plural noun

reasons

show examples

why the state plays an important role in solving the overweight problem among youth is that it can provide material support to improve

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

industries.

In other words

, the government can build many different facilities related to the sport,

such

as a fitness

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

, swimming pools and many others, which in turn may have a positive effect on adolescents' healthy lives.

For example

, in my country, when

policitics

Correct your spelling

politics

took measures and built a

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

where people had an opportunity to follow the healthy

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

, it encourage parents and their

children

to fight

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

obesity.

In addition

, the

governement

Correct your spelling

government

has a significant impact on social media in some countries.

Therefore

, in order to help

children

with their weight

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

, the state may provide information about health exercises, a balanced diet and many other useful things with the Internet, television and other media.

Moreover

, the advertising of fitness

cources

Correct your spelling

courses

and other services can contribute

Change preposition

to a

show examples

rise

Change preposition

show examples

motivation among

children

to go

in for

Change preposition

show examples

sport.

For instance

, my brother was overweight and did not want to do something with that.

However

, after he watched a video on TV where a new fitness

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

in our city suggested

to join to

Change the verb form

joining

show examples

the new course, he liked

this

idea and began to go there.

As a result

, he managed to lose

his

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

weight and became stronger and healthier. In conclusion, the fact that

children

have obesity is quite common today.

Thus

, I think that governments should take some steps to

migitate

Correct your spelling

mitigate

meditate

migrate

this

issue.

Submitted by mar16.f on Mon Sep 27 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

policies
responsibility
health and well-being
education and awareness programs
childhood obesity
food advertising and labeling
unhealthy food
supportive environments
recreational facilities
collaboration
healthcare providers

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Some people think that government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You work in an international company. You need to take some time off work. Write a letter to your employer. In your letter:  explain why you need this time off  give details of when you want this time off  say who can do your work when you are away

Many governments have laws that ban the sale and use of hard drugs such as heroin and cocaine, yet they allow people to buy drugs such as tobacco and alcohol. Laws that prohibit the sale and use of hard drugs should be applied to all drugs, including tobacco and alcohol. What is your opinion?

Smoking should be banned in all public places even though it would restrict some of other people’s freedoms. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

You recently won a photography competition and your photo is going to be shown in an exhibition. ● Invite your friend for the exhibition. ● Please describe the competition prize and about the photograph ●Invite your friend.