We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
In general, it is believed that
individuals
should not be concerned about changes unless they are unlikely to have a major impact on their lives. There is, however
, a need for individuals
to have a thorough understanding of the events occurring in foreign countries. Having a basic understanding of global events is essential for nations to be able to provide assistance to one another and find solutions to their own problems.
Being aware of global affairs initially
provides individuals
with the opportunity to assist others in foreign countries. Around the world, there are frequent occurrences of war, infectious diseases, natural disasters, and a variety of other calamities. The key to distributing resources during times of necessity is to remain attentive to these occurrences in order to be able to provide help at the right time to those who are in need. As an example, the recent conflict between Ukraine and Russia was a great time for significant destruction. Even so, prompt action by international organizations and assistance from other nations allowed Ukraine to save additional victims as a result
of swift action by international organizations. As a result
, they suffered significant losses as well.
In addition
, witnessing these situations may enhance the government's ability to determine how to resolve the issue more effectively if the issue arises within its jurisdiction. Since many societies operate in the same manner, it is easy to understand the outcomes of one society in a more comprehensive way. In the modern world, COVID-19 is the most lethal epidemic disease. In order to minimize the impact of the virus, governments should identify and analyze countries that have successfully managed it.
A well-supported global initiative should enable individuals
to take pride in assisting others and gather valuable knowledge for their future careers. This
makes it imperative for individuals
to develop a maintenance plan for global eventsSubmitted by thanhannguyen2209 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
introduction and conclusion
Consider enhancing your introduction and conclusion to more directly address the prompt and make your position clear. This will strengthen your argument and provide a solid frame for your essay.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay presents a logical structure and progression of ideas, working on smoother transitions between paragraphs could further enhance the readability and flow of your essay.
language use
Try to include a wider variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to add richness and complexity to your writing, which can improve engagement and show a higher level of English proficiency.
supported main points
Your essay effectively uses relevant examples to support your arguments, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic and its broader implications.
task achievement
You've demonstrated a clear understanding of the essay question, providing comprehensive ideas and arguments that are relevant to the prompt.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!