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Band 7

Some people think children have the freedom to make mistakes, while other people believe that adults should prevent children from making mistakes. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #children #freedom #mistakes #adults
Some
people
 think
children
 have the freedom to make
mistakes
, while other
people
 believe that adults should prevent
children
 from making
mistakes
. Discuss both views and give your opinion. In
this
 day and age, a debate with regard to
children
’s freedom of choice has been sparked, drawing much attention from the public. While some
people
 insist that preventing them from making
mistakes
 plays an integral role in rearing
children
’s characteristics, I would side with those who are of opinion that allowing them to fluff can improve their self-confidence.
On the other hand
, averting
children
 to stumble can enhance their self-discipline could be plausible to some extent.
In other words
, those
children
 tend to be more careful in making plans in order to avoid wrongdoings.
This
 may act as a precursor to not only high academic performance but
also
 self-esteem from their peer groups.
However
, those
children
 who are taught to not making any missteps cannot remedy the sudden problems that are not instructed.
Therefore
, they neither cultivate life experiences nor hone practical skills.
On the other hand
, there is ample evidence that permitting
children
 to make missteps is inclined to help them feel self-confidence and resilience whether they fail.
In other words
,
children
 are inclined to express their ideas with other
people
 courageously compared to those who are taught not to flub.
Therefore
 they can stand a better chance of learning from the
mistakes
, which is the driving force behind remembering their
mistakes
 longer as well as avoiding future missteps. Another compelling reason is that
children
 can enable to enlighten themselves on different aspects of life since they must not consider the
mistakes
 that they will make.
Thus
, they can improve their attributes
such
 as
:
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 adaptability, creativity and collaborative skills. In conclusion,
although
 preventing
children
 from making
mistakes
 can help them enhance their characteristics, I believe that permit them to fluff can improve their self-confidence.
Submitted by star.nguyenhuyhoang.2409 on

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • freedom to make mistakes
  • critical thinking skills
  • lifelong learning
  • guided learning environment
  • resilience
  • independence
  • overprotective
  • dependency
  • problem-solving skills
  • confidence
  • negative consequences
  • learning process
  • personal growth
  • trial and error
  • balance safety and learning
  • development
  • support and guidance
  • empowerment
  • risk-taking
  • life lessons
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