The use of social media such as Facebook or Twitter is replacing face-to-face contact this century. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Online chat
platforms
have raised so much
this
day and have become more sophisticated by
people
who
use
tools for chatting or communicating with others.
However
, the
platforms
have good and bad values for
people
so they must
use
them wisely. I believe that there are more advantages than disadvantages for
people
who are using social
media
. There are positive points that social
media
gives to humans so well.
Firstly
, Social
media
platforms
will increase the relationship aspect of their lives
due to
effectiveness and effortlessness.
For example
,
People
will get to know the information about their family easily and freely because it does not affect the cost and distance.
Moreover
, they need to click the button from their smartphone or computer to send something.
Then
, the public is not only chatting on social
media
but
also
video calling with someone.
This
feature becomes the favourite because no matter how long the distance, they feel close together.
Besides
, these tools benefit
people
who want to learn about something new
such
as politics, technology, health, and so on.
For instance
, Twitter and Facebook provide a forum for
people
to discuss issues that must be highlighted.
On the other hand
, social
media
has several negative values and
people
must be aware of
this
issue, especially for youngsters that
use
those
platforms
a lot. They have to filter with whom they communicate.
For example
, there are a number of online chatting tools that provide free chat or video with strangers. It includes sex, porn, or maybe criminal that can affect adolescents live.
Next,
privacy is becoming the number one aspect that must be known by
people
.
In addition
, the public has to restrict some data or
people
that can be seen on social
media
. To illustrate, Twitter is public-based social
media
and everyone can see our posts so we have to lock the account for the public. In conclusion, I think that social
media
platforms
give a lot of advantages for
people
to
use
them.
However
,
people
must be strict about the information and strangers who can see our posts on social
media
.
Submitted by irhamtaufiqurrahman on

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coherence cohesion
Strengthen the coherence by linking ideas within and between paragraphs more effectively. Using transition words or phrases can enhance the flow from one point to the next.
task achievement
Expand on some ideas to provide more clarity and demonstrate comprehensive understanding. This can be achieved by delving deeper into examples and explanations.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view by considering both the advantages and disadvantages of social media use.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly defined, providing a good framework around the central argument.

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