Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people with a better education. Agree or disagree.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Crime
Use synonyms
has always been a hot topic to discuss in society nowadays. Some people argue that the optimal solution to deal with
crime
Use synonyms
issues is
prison
Use synonyms
while others believe
education
Use synonyms
is the better choice. From my perspective, I strongly advocate the former view. To commence with, it is understandable why educational solutions are considerably prefered. The reason for
this
Linking Words
belief is that gentle teaching methods are argued to be the optimal way to raise people’s awareness. To be more specific, if
criminals
Use synonyms
are educated and taught seriously, they may have a chance to broaden
horizon
Add an article
the horizon
show examples
and realise their faults, leading to a lower
crime
Use synonyms
rate in
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, teachers or psychologists will have enough
experiences
Fix the agreement mistake
experience
show examples
to understand and deal with
criminals
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
give the best
Correct your spelling
advice
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
and solutions for them. Despite the values of
education
Use synonyms
, I still believe
this
Linking Words
method is ineffective and
may be
Correct your spelling
maybe
show examples
too dangerous. In my opinion, I strongly believe that
prison
Use synonyms
is still the optimal solution
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
should be prioritised.
First
Linking Words
of all, by
this
Linking Words
regulation, the officials can ensure the security of the society much better. Being behind bars means that all the actions are inhibited and people have no chance to turn back to
Use synonyms
crime
Add an article
the crime
show examples
life.
For instance
Linking Words
, if
prison
Use synonyms
is not promulgated, it is extremely easy for
criminals
Use synonyms
to turn back into
crime
Use synonyms
, affecting residents’ life.
Moreover
Linking Words
, prisons are not only a lesson for prisoners but
also
Linking Words
for citizens.
This
Linking Words
solution is a good example for everyone which forces residents to obey the laws, reducing the number of
criminals
Use synonyms
.
Conversely
Linking Words
,
education
Use synonyms
is not as strict as
Use synonyms
prison
Add an article
a prison
the prison
show examples
that people have a tendency to not be afraid of and not follow the rules. In conclusion, the problem of
crime
Use synonyms
is so dangerous and serious that everyone
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
a joint effort to handle
this
Linking Words
issue. All residents need to hold accountability for
this
Linking Words
whether they prioritise
education
Use synonyms
or prisons methods.
Submitted by hathuylinh1806 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • tackles root causes
  • preventative approach
  • critical thinking
  • decision-making skills
  • recidivism rates
  • equipping
  • socio-economic benefits
  • underlying factors
  • poverty
  • ignorance
  • lack of opportunities
  • rehabilitation
  • ineffective
  • higher rates of re-offending
What to do next:
Look at other essays: