IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people believe time is money. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #time #money
It is considered by many that
value
Correct article usage
the value
show examples
 of
time
 is equal to
value
Add an article
the value
show examples
 of
money
. I agree with the given statement and there are two reasons why I think so and they will be explained in the
next
 few paragraphs.
To begin
 with,
people
 can earn financial resources but not
time
. It is a
well known
Add a hyphen
well-known
show examples
 fact that
sucessfull
Correct your spelling
successful
people
 can compromise on finance, given the choice between
money
 and
time
 hours as
time
 once lost can not be regained in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
. It is the proper utilisation of the
time
 that
people
 are able to prosper in their
life
.
For instance
, famous personalities like Bill Gates and
waren
Correct your spelling
warren
 buffet invested in
time
instead
 of
money
 and were able to build a huge empire. In short, efficiently making use of
time
 will create wealth within
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 short span of
time
.
Secondly
,
time
 is a limited resource. Undoubtedly, every person in the universe
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 24 hours in a day to make most of it during their
Correct your spelling
lifetime
show examples
life
Correct your spelling
lifetime
show examples
time
 due to the fact that
time
 can bring
uncertainity
Correct your spelling
uncertainty
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
. communities must realise that success and failure
depends
Change the verb form
depend
show examples
 upon the
utlility
Correct your spelling
utility
 of
time
 frame. To illustrate, many young minds have become
Add an article
a billionaire
show examples
billionaire
Fix the agreement mistake
billionaires
show examples
 at
early
Add an article
an early
show examples
 age in many economies as they religiously followed the deadlines for their projects and experiments.
Therefore
, sticking to
time
 and managing it wisely would certainly yield benefits to communities after some
time
. In conclusion, I strongly affirm that nowadays
people
 have
money
 but no
time
 and
therefore
money
 can be earned again and again. And due to
short
Correct article usage
the short
show examples
 span of
life
Add a comma
,
show examples
it is obvious that individuals give more preference to
time
.
Submitted by rahat on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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