IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. Do you agree or disagree ?

#people #money #tax
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued sometimes that
tax
Use synonyms
 should not be paid to the country and all the money should be kept by
people
Use synonyms
 who have earned it. I disagree that
people
Use synonyms
 are unnecessary to pay taxes because most of them can
benefit
Use synonyms
 from paying taxes. Paying
tax
Use synonyms
 has economic and security benefits. The main
benefit
Use synonyms
 is that
tax
Use synonyms
 can be used on national defence and public security.
For example
Linking Words
, the government has enough budget to build a powerful army to protect the country. The
tax
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 can be spent on recruiting more policemen and purchasing more high-teach equipment to enhance the security level which helps degrade the violence rate and builds a safer living environment for citizens. Another
benefit
Use synonyms
 is that a country is able to provide financial support to poverty areas and low-income populations by collecting taxes.
Tax
Use synonyms
 can be invested in education in underdeveloped areas,
such
Linking Words
 as providing free job skills training, building more schools and hiring well-educated teachers. Once
people
Use synonyms
 have the opportunities to receive Aa good education, it will become a strong motivation to the local economy, which
also
Linking Words
 accelerates the state.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, what we should not ignore is that if
people
Use synonyms
 do not pay any
tax
Use synonyms
 , they are more likely to have a better material life, which will encourage them to work hard in order to chase more income. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 keeping all income may bring more fortune to
people
Use synonyms
, I hold the view that we should pay
tax
Use synonyms
, due to the fact that it can
benefit
Use synonyms
 all the
people
Use synonyms
 who live in the state.
Submitted by cynthia7104 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribute
  • welfare
  • public services
  • progressive taxation
  • distribution of wealth
  • civic duty
  • social cohesion
  • tax evasion
  • economic disparities
  • social unrest
  • individual rights
  • societal responsibilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: