In many countries, people now wear western-style dress such as suits and jeans rather than traditional clothing. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

People
wear numerous types of
dresses
in order to express their traditions and emotions. Despite the fact that
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
dresses
such
as jeans and coats are popular among
people
because of their trendy fashion, I believe that there is a negative impact of
this
behaviour as
people
will forget their traditional
values
.
People
love to wear modern
dresses
because they are trendy and comfortable. Social media posts, news and movies are always showing individuals who are wearing skinny jeans, shorts and beautiful fashionable
clothes
.
Moreover
, these
apparels
Fix the agreement mistake
apparel
show examples
are
also
lightweight as compared to traditional
clothes
that are composed of multiple layers of fabric and heavy embroidery.
For example
, these days, numerous shopping malls are selling modern
European style
Add a hyphen
European-style
show examples
clothes
rather than
old fashioned
Add a hyphen
old-fashioned
show examples
suits.
Hence
,
this
behaviour shows that
people
want to buy
clothes
that are popular and easy to wear.
However
, there is a significant negative effect of foreign apparel as
people
will forget their family
values
.
Firstly
, If we continue to wear trendy
clothes
in our daily lives,
then
our children will follow the same. So, after a few generations, nobody will remember any family
values
regarding
dresses
.
Secondly
, not only do
clothes
represent emotions, but they
also
show the dignity of our forefathers. In
this
way, we can lose our family traditions by wearing modern
clothes
.
For example
, many aboriginal tribes in Australia still wear their traditional
dresses
in order to preserve their culture and
values
. In conclusion, we examined why
people
are wearing fashionable apparel because of their popularity,
as well as
why
this
behaviour has a negative impact on individuals as we can forget our family
values
. In my opinion,
people
should respect their traditions rather than
following
Wrong verb form
follow
show examples
fashion trends.
Submitted by imranabhc on

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task response
Ensure that the essay fully addresses the question prompt, providing a balanced view of the reasons for the trend and evaluating its positive or negative impact. Avoid providing a one-sided argument and ensure that all aspects of the prompt are addressed.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally clear, with a well-defined introduction and conclusion. However, there is room for improvement in the development of ideas within paragraphs, ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a single main point and that ideas are logically connected throughout the essay.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, including the use of a variety of words and phrases related to the topic. However, there is an opportunity to use more precise and sophisticated vocabulary to convey ideas more effectively.
grammatical range
The essay displays a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but more complex sentence structures and a wider variety of sentence types could be used to enhance coherence and demonstrate a more advanced command of English.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • globalization
  • cultural homogenization
  • western-style dress
  • traditional clothing
  • cosmopolitan
  • modernity
  • fashion preferences
  • cultural identity
  • conformity
  • practicality
  • multinational corporations
  • socio-economic factors
  • cross-cultural
  • cultural appreciation
  • diversity
  • influence
  • heritage
  • textiles
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