Not many young people in countries around the world go to and enjoy concerts and plays. Why is this the case? Should they be encouraged to attend?

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The entertainment industry

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

changed the way

people

Use synonyms

enjoy their free time. They have made several viable options available to us through which

people

Use synonyms

can while away their time.

As a

Linking Words

result

Add a comma

,result

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various youngsters these days

does

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show examples

not prefer to go and enjoy shows or plays. There are several reasons for

this

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, which I will brief in the following paragraphs.

Firstly

Linking Words

its

Replace the word

it's

it is

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the comfort zone that matters to most. Numerous young

people

Use synonyms

Correct your spelling

today's

todays

Change to a genitive case

today's

show examples

world are engrossed in it and they do not want to come out of it.

For instance

Linking Words

, availability of several shows to watch within one touch

such

Linking Words

as youtube, live video or channels etc.

This

Linking Words

engulfs them to sit and enjoy it in their own zone, without

being have

Change the verb form

having

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to travel far.

Secondly

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, technological

advancement

Fix the agreement mistake

advancements

show examples

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

made them

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apply

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be deprived

from

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show examples

enjoying any

sorts

Fix the agreement mistake

sort

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of art.

Correct your spelling

Most

show examples

Mostly

Correct your spelling

Most

show examples

youth today are so much addicted to social media that they do not seem to care or encourage anything else.

For example

Linking Words

instagram

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Instagram

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facebook

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Facebook

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twitter

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Twitter

show examples

snapchat

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Snapchat

snap chat

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etc have made

this

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generation so busy that they cannot come out of it to appreciate

anythingelse

Correct your spelling

anything else

Moreover

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, the stress and struggle in

lives

Correct article usage

the lives

show examples

people

Use synonyms

have

also

Linking Words

taken a toll on them which puts them off to attend

such

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social gatherings.

However

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this

Linking Words

can be combated by following certain measures

such

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as; providing free passes, attractive offers on certain deals or free meals provided during the show. As these will eventually attract the youth to attend the shows.

Similarly

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, companies or firm's hosting

such

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concerts should reach out

the

Change preposition

to the

show examples

younger

people

Use synonyms

and tell them how it would benefit them by just attending

this

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gathering.

This

Linking Words

way they would be encouraged to be a part of the show. To conclude, attending

such

Linking Words

events completely depends on their individual desires.

Hence

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this

Linking Words

can be influenced by showing the right track to them.

vineethecSun Oct 10 2021

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

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Not many young people in countries around the world go to and enjoy concerts and plays. Why is this the case? Should they be encouraged to attend?

Your opinion

Write a letter to the transport officer about a problem with transportation system in your area please say Describe the situation you are facing Why do you consider it a problem? What changes would you like to recommend?

Some people think the government should pay for healthcare and education, but other people claim that it is the individual’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

First impressions are important. Some people think that doing well in interviews is the key to securing a good job. To what extent do you agree?

Some people say that no one should do the same job forever, While others belelive that doing the same job is beneficial for the individual, company and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?