IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think that when a person travels into different culture they should adapt to the local practices and customs.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #person #culture #practices #customs
There is a number of people who believe that when individuals
travel
 to divergent destinations and convictions they have to respect and modify themselves with the local community.I,
however
, wholeheartedly agree with the given statement on the basis of maintaining mandatory social
order
 and opportunity to experience strange convictions for
passengers
.
To begin
 with, the main reason is that maintaining mandatory social
order
 is a determining factor to law enforcement in the destination country,regardless of respect to host nations
passengers
 can not enjoy their
travel
 despite not being obligated they might face some warning from police and in charge persons so it is immensely necessary for travellers to be obeyed to rules,
firstly
 to maintain social
order
 and
secondly
 to pursue their
travel
 without any tension.so it mutually benefits for both host country and travellers. Having said that,
however
, maintain mandatory social
order
 are not the only causative factor in
this
 respect.Another compelling argument is the opportunity for
passengers
 to become cosmopolitan and experience a wide range of customs,cultures,beliefs,cuisine,nature and religion.as a consequence a person has an abundance of information about different countries despite their adaption to divergent customs and practices.
moreover
, cosmopolitan persons are more flexible,experienced,patient and efficient for society.and if the government encourages people to
travel
 more often,
then
 the future community will be more vibrant and experience than nowadays.
for instance
,people of developed countries who had the opportunity to put the budget to
travel
 to different resorts are more satisfied and welfare but
also
 they can manage to be a better human resource for the community. To conclude, I personally take the view that it is ethically acceptable to adapt to local convictions and civilization.because of the rewarding ,
results
Add the preposition
inresults
fromresults
show examples
 it brings like maintaining social security and
order
 as well as make
passengers
 more experienced and cosmopolitan for the society.
Submitted by hadis.amn on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: