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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some children receive almost no encouragement from their parents regarding their performance at school, while other children receive too much pressure from their over enthusiastic parents which can have a negative impact on the child. Why do you think some parents put too much pressure on their children to perform well at school?

#children #encouragement #parents #performance #school #pressure #impact #child
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There are two ends of the spectrum in
this
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 regard. On one hand, many
children
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 receive none or almost no form of encouragement from
parents
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, whilst
on the other hand
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, some
parents
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 can be very overbearing meaning that they put colossal amounts of pressure on their
children
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. Both of these traits can have devastating effects on a
child
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. In
this
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 essay, we shall see why
parents
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 put much pressure on their
children
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. The job market today is highly competitive and every parent wants their
child
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 to get a good, well-paying job.
However
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, for that to happen, the
children
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 need to achieve nothing but excellence in their academic roles.
For example
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, in Kerala, the academic competition is so high that, 40% of
children
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 who score in the 90th percentile in their final boards still find it hard to get admission to colleges.
On the other hand
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, you have
parents
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 who show no interest in their
child
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's academic life and provide no encouragement.
This
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 may be because they believe that, celebrating your
child
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's smallest achievement is not the way to help them achieve their true potential. The role of a parent should be more of a nurturer, more than anything else.
Parents
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 need to realise that no one individual can reach exceptional levels all the time, and rather they should concentrate on being there for their
children
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 rather than force them to achieve excellence all the time. If
parents
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 pressure their
children
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 to do nothing less than attain 100% grades, there will be a disconnect between the
parents
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 and
children
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, because if the kids are unable to achieve
this
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 grade, they will become ashamed to tell
this
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 to their
parents
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. In conclusion,
parents
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 play a key role in a
child
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's academic development, and they should understand that they need to be nurturers more than anything else, for the sake of the youngster's psychological development.
Submitted by Nigelvictorlawrence on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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