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Band 6.5

Young people say that travelling to different countries benefits them and the society. Do you agree or disagree. Give your opinion.

#people #countries #society
Travelling is indeed a breathtaking and mesmerising experience. Especially, younger
people
 these days prefer to visit other
countries
 as tourists. I strongly agree with the fact that travelling to different
countries
 is beneficial to both themselves and
society
. To commence with, some
people
 like to do it as a relaxation. They plan holidays every year.
This
 in turn is an advantage to themselves. Doing so helps them in experiencing a change in their daily routine. Yet another reason is that some
people
 are keen on meeting new populace and learning about their culture.
For instance
, many YouTubers have blogs about their travel. These
people
 enjoy visiting places and posting video blogs.
This
 benefits them as well as
society
.
Furthermore
, some
people
 do travel for business purposes.
For example
, in order to maintain a good foreign relation with other ,
countries
 the Prime Minister of India frequently visit other
countries
.
Such
 kinds of travels benefit
society
. Many psychiatrists prescribe travel to their patients with mental conditions like depression so that they recover faster.
Moreover
, the younger generations these days have many foreign immersion programs that encourage them to visit a foreign country while they are studying. These kinds of travels give them good exposure and help them in developing their personalities. To conclude, having a healthy mind in turn results in a healthy body.
Consequently
, leading to a healthy
society
. In order to keep the mind healthy, it is prominent to experience a change by travelling to other
countries
 and meeting new
people
.
Submitted by suba2705.sk on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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