IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

People who do not know how to use computer will become more and more disadvantaged. State the disadvantages and what action governments should take.

In recent years,many
people
Use synonyms
do
Correct pronoun usage
who do
show examples
 not know how to
use
Use synonyms
 new technology will face a large
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of
trubles
Correct your spelling
troubles
.In
this
Linking Words
essay
Punctuation problem
essay,
show examples
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 will
discusse disavdantaged
Correct your spelling
discuss disadvantaged
 and what the
government
Use synonyms
 should
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
do. On the one hand,nowadays
socity
Correct your spelling
society
 has begun to place all its responsibilities on the
computer
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is because
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern life requires to
use
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of combuters
show examples
combuters
Correct your spelling
computers
 and phones everywhere.For
exampel
Correct your spelling
example
,in
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
,
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 and even if
people
Use synonyms
 want to book
Correct article usage
an appoitnment
show examples
appoitnment
Correct your spelling
appointment
 in the hospital,which
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
 become more modern and
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have been updated
many
Change preposition
with many
show examples
 things to
bacome
Verb problem
make it
show examples
 easier.
Therefore
Linking Words
,if
their
Use the right word
there
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 some
people
Use synonyms
 who do not
how
Verb problem
know how
show examples
 to
use
Use synonyms
 the
Use synonyms
computer
Punctuation problem
computer,
show examples
 they will be in
seriuse
Correct your spelling
serious
 problems.
Such
Linking Words
 as, they cannot continue their work
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
if
techers
Correct your spelling
teachers
 ask them to send the assignment
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
web site
Use the right word
website
show examples
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 if one of them is sick will stay
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
hospital
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
 long time than
people
Use synonyms
 who booked
appointment
Correct article usage
an appointment
show examples
 online.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
The
Fix capitalization
the
show examples
government
Use synonyms
 should make
awarness campigns
Correct your spelling
awareness campaigns
 to learning
people
Use synonyms
 who do not
how
Verb problem
know how
show examples
Use synonyms
use
Verb problem
to use
show examples
 new technology.Because the
government
Use synonyms
 can afford all resources to make
advertise
Replace the word
advertisements
show examples
 and
campigns
Correct your spelling
campaigns
.
In addition
Linking Words
,most of the old
people
Use synonyms
 and
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
 do not have someone to guide them and learned them what the
consequence
Fix the agreement mistake
consequences
show examples
if
Verb problem
are if
show examples
 they cannot
use
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
computer
Correct article usage
a computer
show examples
.
As a result
Linking Words
, the
government
Use synonyms
 should create
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
free courses
duo
Check wording
apply
show examples
to
presreve
Correct your spelling
protect
 these
people
Use synonyms
 from the
possiple
Correct your spelling
possible
 hard situations.
Also
Linking Words
,some
development
Replace the word
developing
show examples
 countries have a
fantastice depatment
Correct your spelling
fantastic department
 to help
Linking Words
Change preposition
with this
show examples
this kind
Fix the agreement mistake
these kinds
show examples
 of challenges.
However
Linking Words
,with the productive
system
Add a comma
system,
show examples
 many
people
Use synonyms
 may
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
benifite
Correct your spelling
benefit
 In conclusion,nowadays many
people
Use synonyms
 try to follow the trend to avoid
experience
Replace the word
experiencing
show examples
 dangerous
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
.
Altough
Correct your spelling
Although
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
the
government
Use synonyms
 can
aware
Verb problem
be aware
show examples
these
Change preposition
of these
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 by
create
Wrong verb form
creating
show examples
learning
Correct article usage
a learning
show examples
 system of new technology and the
computer
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Plan your essay with a clear outline before writing. List 3 main ideas and use one point per paragraph. End with a short, strong conclusion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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