IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people feel that the design of newly constructed buildings in big cities should be controlled by governments. Others believe those who finance the construction of a building should be free to design it as they see fit. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #design #buildings #cities #governments #finance #construction
Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
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, We see
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of new
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
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constructing
Wrong verb form
constructed
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 in metropolitan cities. Some
people
 think
think
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
that these
construction
Change the determiner
constructions
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 need to
controlled
Add a missing verb
be controlled
show examples
 by
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 while
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
 say it totally
depend
Change the verb form
depends
show examples
 on
person
Add an article
the person
show examples
 who is paying for the construction of
buildings
. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 we will discuss both
aspect
Change to a plural noun
aspects
show examples
 and will give our opinion.
Establishment
Correct article usage
The establishment
show examples
 of new
buildings
 will attract
people
 to visit and travel city.
Hence
, it will make
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 admired tourist place.
People
 from other countries will come to visit various fascinating
buildings
.
For example
, Dubai is
cosidered
Correct your spelling
considered
 to be
most
Add an article
the most
show examples
 captivating city in
whole
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the whole
show examples
 world. Do you know what is the reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 that? It is because of the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
building like Burj Khalifa and other
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
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 and it is
also
 contributing
in
Change preposition
to
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 boosting the economy of
dubai
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Dubai
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 as millions of
people
 visit there and spend money there.
However
, We should invest money in other necessary things rather than spending it constructing
buildings
 and so it should be controlled by
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 and that money need to be spent on other important issues like eradicating poverty from the countries, to educate all the section of society, to clean the cities as well as
country
Add an article
the country
a country
show examples
. To illustrate, India is at
top
Add an article
the top
show examples
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 problems like poverty, education and filth. So, All society of children whether rich or poor should study which will eradicate poverty from our country. There is too much dirt and
gardage
Correct your spelling
garbage
garage
 so we need to work on that issue too. In my opinion,
There
Correct your spelling
there
show examples
 are big issues we
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 are facing. So ,
Correct your spelling
our
show examples
out
Correct your spelling
our
show examples
first
 priority should be to fight
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
those problems and
solve
Correct pronoun usage
themsolve
show examples
, rather than
construting
Correct your spelling
constructing
 building in which only high class of
people
 can live and work. To conclude, I would say it is
also
 important to have some beautiful
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
 but before
that
Add a comma
,that
show examples
 there are other big drawbacks which need to
Add a missing verb
be fixed
show examples
fixed
Change the form of the verb
fix
show examples
.
Submitted by anash.suhail on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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