IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that the differencebetween the lowest paid jobs and the highest paid jobs should be reduced To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people argue that the employees should get fair
wages
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 and, the difference between the highest paid
jobs
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 and the
lowest paid
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lowest-paid
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jobs
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 should be decreased. In my option, I cannot entirely agree with it, the reason is that employees only get the amount of wage, are depending on their
degree
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 level and their professional
jobs
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.
Firstly
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, people who have bachelor or master
degrees
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 often have a wide of range
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job
Change preposition
of job
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 opportunities than those who do not have
degrees
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. It is natural that they will get offered in bigger and popular companies, and by ,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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 they will get highly paid too,
for instance
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, an accountant who did a master
degree
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 and work in
for example
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 Nordea. It is obvious that they will get higher
wages
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 due to
the
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apply
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their professionalism.
On the other hand
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, those who have no
degree
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,
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apply
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 will often have fewer
job
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 opportunities. They may have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
job
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 types that do not require any
degrees
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,
for instance
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, a salesperson does not need a
degree
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 in order to do the
job
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 .
Therefore
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,
such
Linking Words
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job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 get the lowest paid due to no demand, the reason is that the
job
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 type does not require high education.
Therefore
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 they do not get the same wage as
for example
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 a doctor´s salary. In conclusion,
Although
Linking Words
 those who do not have
degrees
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, should still get reasonable
wages
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.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, It is obvious that those who have
a professional
Correct the article-noun agreement
a professional job
professional jobs
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jobs
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,
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apply
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 should get higher
wages
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 than those who do not have. No matter what, all the employees should get reasonable
wages
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, depending on their level.

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