IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people believe that studying for a university degree is better for an individual’s career than gaining work experience immediately after high school. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#people #university #individual’s #career #work #school
Most people assume that continuing studies after completing high school is more significant than a person getting a job. The importance of graduation after schooling rather than working which was always debatable has now become more controversial with many people claiming that it is beneficial while others reject
this
 notion. The substantial influence of
this
trend
 has sparked controversy over the potential impact in recent years. I am of the opinion that higher education is foremost than work.
This
 essay will
further
 elaborate my views favouring both positive and negative impact of
this
trend
 and
thus
 will lead to the logical conclusion. There are myriad of reasons which will
further
 elaborate
this
 argument but the most preponderant one stems from the fact that the degree will boost the confidence and will help to get a deluge of job opportunities once after completing studies
furthermore
 they will be able to get the bulk package. Another pivotal aspect of
this
trend
 is that they will not only able to earn in the home country but
also
 they can migrate to abroad
likewise
 earn twice. A recent study proved that graduates will be earning nearly $50,000 meanwhile others earn $30,000 at the early stage of their careers. Elaborating my viewpoint, there are some more merits but one of the crucial effects is that if an individual belongs to a poor family they might have to take up of family responsibility by finding a job immediately after schooling.
In addition
 to that, they might not be able to afford university tuition fees which apparently increases child labour.
Moreover
,
although
 if a person chooses work overstudies at the early stage of education the will not be able to get standard salaries when compared with educated people.
Hence
, it is clear why many are against
this
trend
. To conclude, according to the arguments aforementioned above, that the benefits of university education are indeed too great to ignore.
Submitted by niraj1997naidu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: