discuss, The older you get , the more difficult life becomes.

Each
person
will come across all the stages of
life
. It is believed that, when an individual becomes older,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
turns into tragedy.
This
is true in
this
recent era and I agree with
this
statement.
This
essay describes the reasons for the former view. To commence, each
person
will grow into old. When
life
began as an infant, start to crawl and slowly learn to walk and talk. They are dependent on their parents, who helps them as a support system. But, when the same individual
grown
Wrong verb form
grows
show examples
as an old man, the situation becomes worse. Being old, even they need help to walk and perform certain chores.
However
,
people
are not willing to do
such
Correct your spelling
much
show examples
help.
This
makes the number of
people
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
joining in the old
age
home.
As a result
, old
age
homes are increased nowadays when compared to
previous
Add an article
the previous
show examples
period.
For instance
, a friend of mine, who joined his
grand-father
Correct your spelling
grandfather
show examples
in an old
age
home recently because he could not able to walk.
Furthermore
, elderly
people
should learn to lead their
life
in
healthy
Change the article
a healthy
show examples
way in order to overcome
this
situation. If a
person
stays fit, the need of visiting
hospital
Add an article
the hospital
a hospital
show examples
is not necessary.
This
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
their dependency on others.
In addition
to
this
, they feel that they were in
insecurity
Correct article usage
an insecurity
show examples
state. They might think, though surrounded by few
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
, but still they were not
in
Correct your spelling
insecure
show examples
secure
Correct article usage
a secure
show examples
stage. To conclude, each
person
will face
Add an article
a struggle
show examples
struggle
Fix the agreement mistake
struggles
show examples
in
many
Correct your spelling
any
show examples
situation
Change to a plural noun
situations
show examples
, despite he is old or young. But, in old
age
, it is more difficult to have food or to maintain health. Based on the aforementioned reasons, when
people
getting
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
older their
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
turn
into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
difficult.
Submitted by priyankasumathi21 on

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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