The growing number of overweight people is putting strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issue involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the school curriculam. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #strain #health #care #system #effort #education #lessons #school #curriculam

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Owing to the problems which a growing population of overweight

people

Use synonyms

cause for the health care system, some

people

Use synonyms

believe that the key to solving

this

Linking Words

issue

Use synonyms

is to have more exercise and sports in school. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

idea of having more physical activities but along with that I

also

Linking Words

want to suggest maintaining a healthy diet in your daily routine.

Firstly

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

issue

Use synonyms

of obesity and

weight

Use synonyms

problems are increasing day by day and because of

this

Linking Words

our health care system is deteriorating. One way to tackle

this

Linking Words

issue

Use synonyms

is to have regular exercises and sports in the school curriculum. If we learn and adapt all these things at a very young age and make our habit to do some physical workout on regular basis we will be happier and healthier.

For instance

Linking Words

, I saw many

people

Use synonyms

who are doing some physical activity daily and they look younger, fitter and energetic as compared to

people

Use synonyms

who hardly do any workout. Another point to consider is that eating healthy

food

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

helps to maintain your

weight

Use synonyms

. If you are eating fast

food

Use synonyms

for instance

Linking Words

pizza, burger, or more oily or fatty

food

Use synonyms

you will become obese. Even after doing a workout you can not reduce that much

weight

Use synonyms

and will feel tired and less enthusiastic, so incorporating a diet which

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

protein, vitamins, minerals or leafy vegetables is

also

Linking Words

a crucial factor to control your

weight

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, to deal with

this

Linking Words

issue

Use synonyms

of an increasing population of unfit, overweight

people

Use synonyms

, we should practice at a very young age by incorporating physical education in school.

In addition

Linking Words

to that, we should

also

Linking Words

avoid fatty and fast

food

Use synonyms

and have more healthy foods in our appetite.

Submitted by sainiriya993 on Tue Nov 09 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
The best for the government to solve the problem of traffic congestion is providing free public transport per day, 7 day a week. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
Over the last two or three decades, traffic congestion has increased more tremendously than ever before due to increasing the ownership of own cars. However, some say that the traffic issuse can be solved by providing the free public transportation of the whole week. I strongly disagree with this notion and this essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.
6
band
Most people are not interested in how their food has been produced. They only care about how much it costs. How true is this statement? What influences people when they buy food?
There is a concern that most people nowadays do not care about the production methods of their food. Their only concern is how much they have to pay for it. While this may be the case for some, it is not the same for the rest. To my knowledge, there are other important factors beside the price that most would consider before making a purchase, such as nutritional values and having a balanced diet.
8
band
Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
In the contemporary world, the debate over whether to adhere to local customs and behaviours when visiting a new country or to embrace cultural differences as encouraged by the host country is a prominent topic. From my perspective, both of these viewpoints have their merits, and it is important to consider the implications of each.
6.5
band
In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
Due to developments in technology and the tight schedules of individuals, people's lifestyles are getting unhealthier, and gaining weight is becoming common in societies. This phenomenon is caused by two main reasons and a number of solutions are possible.
<4
band
It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. What are the causes? And what will be the effects on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.
There is a current distressing situation that in most of the countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. In fact, it has reached an alarming situation. The following paragraphs would highlight various aspects of this menace and propose a handful of remedial measures.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

The best for the government to solve the problem of traffic congestion is providing free public transport per day, 7 day a week. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Most people are not interested in how their food has been produced. They only care about how much it costs. How true is this statement? What influences people when they buy food?

In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. What are the causes? And what will be the effects on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.