Nowadays, some people believe that fashion is too important for young people and it has a negative impact on people and society. Do you agree or disagree?

Some argue that clothing has a vital role among youths, and it can

cause

Use synonyms

drawbacks as the importance of trend. I fully agree with the point of view and

this

Linking Words

essay will highlight the negatives of the perspective regarding

clothes

Use synonyms

as too crucial parts of life.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the main disadvantages are that young people spend too much time and money on shopping, which can adversely impact their academic performances and

cause

Use synonyms

financial issues to their family. Youngsters who are too into their appearances tend to dedicate their time to picking the attractive outfit

instead

Linking Words

of concentrating on their school courses,

as a result

Linking Words

, damaging their grades.

Moreover

Linking Words

, teenagers without any income will pester their parents to squander money on those overpriced stylish

clothes

Use synonyms

or expensive luxury brands, which could bite into the family budget. According to recent research from a famous Chinese sociologist, more than 70

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation rely on their parents in order to buy name-brand

clothes

Use synonyms

. It is clearly seen that excessive time and money wasted on shopping can pose a threat to both studies and financial status. On top of that, placing too much value on fashion can

also

Linking Words

cause

Use synonyms

a social problem. Individuals who lay emphasis on stylish

clothes

Use synonyms

tend to judge others by what they wear for the fashion and the value of their wearings. These days, teenagers are likely to divide financial classes by people's luxury accessories and outfits, and easily ignore or even think less of peers with cheaper-price garments.

This

Linking Words

kind of outlook on values will make our society become a money-oriented world in the long term. People will only focus on their material desires

instead

Linking Words

of spiritual needs in the future. In conclusion, I believe that the perspective of considering

clothes

Use synonyms

as a core element is able to

cause

Use synonyms

academic, financial, and societal problems.

Therefore

Linking Words

, teenagers should take efforts to alleviate

this

Linking Words

materialistic social atmosphere.

lslethan

Nov 15, 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

318 words

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Nowadays, some people believe that fashion is too important for young people and it has a negative impact on people and society. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Education for young people is important in many countries. However, some people think that the government should spend more money on education for the adult population who cannot read and write. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As an overseas employee, write a resignation letter to your employer due to an emergency at home. You should write - the reason for leaving, - date of departure, and things that you loved about your job

Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies. Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing. Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why?