Some people think that children nowadays have too much freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #children #freedom

Nowadays, most

children

seem to travel

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apply

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home from

school

along with the sunset, which is much earlier than their

counterpart

Fix the agreement mistake

counterparts

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in the past. For

this

reason, some people argue that

children

are too free at present. In the past, after

school

, there was a lot of

housework

waiting

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forwaiting

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children

to help their

parents

-- taking care of little sister or brother and cooking

for example

. Those things took a large percentage of so-called free time and

thus

children

had not much

freedom

to focus on their own hobbies even after class.

By contrast

parents

nowadays will try their best or even employ a servant to do all

housework

so that

children

only need to concentrate on their

study

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studies

show examples

Therefore

, when they go home from

school

, what is

waiting

Add the preposition

forwaiting

show examples

them is clean, tidy rooms and well-prepared meals. That means they can enjoy more

freedom

to do what they are interested in.

However

, even though there is no need for

children

to devote themselves to

housework

any more

Correct your spelling

anymore

show examples

, there is much more homework.

Besides

, because of the delightful desire of every parent that their offspring will be superior, they often

enroll

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enrol

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their

children

to take some after-class lessons to assist them to consolidate what they have learned at

school

. What is more, at weekend some

children

even hurry to several

specialty

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speciality

show examples

training classes that their

parents

force them to attend. Indeed, they possess much less

freedom

. In conclusion, I strongly think that

although

current

children

do not need to do

housework

, they have less

freedom

and more pressure from

parents

and society, because their schedule after class arranged by their mom or dad is much too full.

Submitted by 1378468145 on Fri Nov 26 2021

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that children nowadays have too much freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

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