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Band 6.5

Nowadays people have adopted an unhealthy lifestyle. Why do you think this is. How could this problem be solved?

#people #lifestyle
In the present era, more and more people are living unhealthy lives.
This
 essay will analyze the contributors to
this
 trend, followed by measures to address
this
 problem.
First
 of all, many individuals like office workers and students are living a sedentary life, which can cause a damaging effect on their bodies. To be specific, sitting on a chair for too long could impose extra pressure on one's spine and neck.
Also
, they rarely do outdoor activities or participate in
sports
, which is beneficial to their health condition.
Secondly
, adults have all kinds of pressures related to employment prospects, marriage and living expenses, which can pose a threat to their physical and mental health.
For example
, the number of smokers is increasing dramatically caused by individuals' hectic and stressful lives. Smoking cigarettes can significantly damage one's lungs and heart. There are several measures that can be taken to alleviate the issue.
Firstly
, governments can invest money in building
sports
 centres and outdoor playgrounds, which can provide space for people to enjoy playing
sports
. Other than
this
, propagandizing information about the benefits of doing regular exercise and developing balanced dietary habits is a practical way to encourage people to take part in physical activities and eat food
that is
 conducive to their health.
Moreover
, policymakers can levy tobacco tax, a useful approach that can increase the cost of both manufacturing and purchasing cigarettes,
consequently
 discouraging them from smoking. As discussed above, sedentary occupations and stressful society are key factors to unwholesome lifestyles and behaviours.
However
, governments can mitigate the issue by constructing
sports
 facilities, promoting healthy lifestyles and charging tobacco tax.
Submitted by lslethan on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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