Some people say that we do not need printed newspapers anymore. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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One school of thought holds that with the rapid development of the media industry over the past few decades, traditional
newspapers
have experienced a decline in the number of readers.
While
this
perception is somewhat justifiable, I believe that conventional
newspapers
are irreplaceable to various extents. On the one hand, it is understandable that reading
news
on paper is not as widely used as before. First and foremost, reading
news
online is significantly more convenient nowadays. To simplify, with the advent of hi-tech devices with internet allowances, citizens can keep themselves updated by using their own phones through online information channels.
Consequently
,
this
acts as a precursor to the high rate of internet-based
news
users in the comfort of their own homes
instead
of commuting a long distance to get a newspaper in the
newstands
Correct your spelling
newsstands
.
Secondly
, it is worth mentioning that digital
newspapers
are mostly free of charge.
In other words
, some e-papers from various sources do not charge users, thereby leading to a massive number of readers considering it an ideal choice.
As a result
, printed publications would become less known to the public.
On the other hand
, there are a host of compelling reasons why I am convinced that it is hard to see traditional
newspapers
ever ceasing to exist. One key rationale is that reading
news
on a digital screen too often can have an adverse effect on the eyes.
This
negative trend could cause those who suffer from eye problems to gravitate towards the traditional ones. Another justification is that the disappearance of
newspapers
could negatively affect businesses related to manufacturing books, namely publishers or logging companies.
This
is to say,
this
could put a strain on the thriving economy of one’s nation
as well as
cause companies to end up downsizing or even going bankrupt.
This
is to say that
this
phenomenon is attributable to massive unemployment in the worst-case scenario. In conclusion,
while
it is irrefutable that printed material has been on the wane
due to
some beneficial aspects in
this
day and age, I would contend that it still plays a pivotal role in our daily lives.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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task achievement
Be sure to include more specific examples and data to support your arguments. This would strengthen your essay and demonstrate a deeper level of analysis.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between your paragraphs to enhance the flow of the essay further. This will make it easier for the reader to follow your arguments.
language
Try to paraphrase more when introducing major points and arguments to avoid repetition and maintain the reader’s interest.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and compelling introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your arguments.
task achievement
Your main points are adequately developed and supported, showing a good understanding of the topic.
task achievement
You have presented a balanced view, acknowledging both sides of the argument, which adds depth to your essay.
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