You recently purchased an item from a local store, but you are not satisfies with your purchase. Write a letter to the manager of the store. In your letter •Describe the item you bought and why you need it •explain why you are not happy with it •say what you would like the manager to do Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

#item #store #purchase #manager #•describe #•explain #•say #sir #madam

Dear Sir / Madam, I am writing to express my dissatisfaction regarding an item which I recently bought from your local store. A few days back, I bought a white puffer

jacket

from your local Merivale store and it was on sale for $65.99. I wanted to give it as a present to my brother on his birthday.

This

product was very much special for me because my brother needs a

jacket

as he currently

don't

Change the verb form

doesn't

show examples

have one The product was perfect when I tried it but when I reached home and showed it to my children, I came to know that the sleeves from

left

Correct article usage

the left

show examples

sleeve are broken.

This

created a big hole on the left side of the

jacket

However

, I immediately went to the store for an exchange but the jackets were sold out. At

this

point, I would request you to arrange

Correct article usage

the

show examples

exact same

jacket

for me as I want to send it to my brother and his birthday is coming up in two days. Waiting to hear back from you. Yours sincerely, Tirth Thakkar

Submitted by tirththakkar23 on Sun Mar 24 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single clear idea to maintain coherence. Introducing, explaining, and concluding each concept clearly can enhance your writing's effectiveness.

Task Response

For even clearer task achievement, elaborate on how the jacket's issue affects its usability or its significance to your brother to further justify your dissatisfaction and request.

General Improvement

Though your letter maintains a polite and appropriate tone, varying your sentence structure more and employing a wider range of expressions could enrich your letter's quality.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

180 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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