Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. You should write at least 250 words.
Imagine our world without any entertainment which will exist in case we vanish
music
form
our life. These sounds are the main bridge where education , history and culture Correct your spelling
from
traveled
through every century from the beginning of humanity. Change the spelling
travelled
Therefore
, I beileve
that international melodies are more significant Correct your spelling
believe
that
traditional onesCorrect your spelling
than
,
and they are considered Remove the comma
apply
as
essential tools for learning, healing and amusement.
Presently, musical instruments are working an efficient role in many social facilities. In schools, teachers are using them to clarify difficult materials for students in a convenient way Change preposition
apply
such
as math courses which are recorded on musical audio tapes
. Another benefit of Correct your spelling
audiotapes
music
were
discovered in hospitals where it helps patients to remain calm during and after surgeries. Change the verb form
was
Finally
, there are many pieces and performances that are dedicated to specific occasions like weddings, funerals and concerts.
Secondly
, our planet is developing in
high speed with new technologies which are appearing every day, so there Change preposition
at
no
more place for traditional Add a missing verb
is no
music
. Young generations are seeking the modern trends in songs especially the one which scores high rate of listening or views without any consideration of its orginality
or historical background. Correct your spelling
originality
In addition
of
that, the Change preposition
to
wide spread
of social media Correct your spelling
widespread
such
as Facebook, Youtube and Tiktok assist in the advertisment
of recent singers. These artists aim to expand their Correct your spelling
advertisement
audiance
worldwide, and they are not concentrating on the quality of their products.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
audience
music
is the principale
incentive for all other occupations whatever it is educational or professional. As result, I hope that Correct your spelling
principal
principle
this
domain will unit us as human
race known Correct article usage
a human
with
its compassion and love.Change preposition
for
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite