Many young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to study or work in the cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?

#people #homes #areas #study #work #cities #development

More and more

youngester

Correct your spelling

youngster

youngsters

leave their countrysides for jobs and to higher

study

in the urban

areas

. I think it is

positive

Correct article usage

a positive

show examples

deveolpment

Correct your spelling

development

for teenagers .

Firstly

, the disadvantage of

work

Wrong verb form

working

show examples

in urban

areas

Add a missing verb

is we

show examples

have to go far from our

parents

and

parents

can feel

lonly

Correct your spelling

lonely

. Which is not

good

Add an article

a good

show examples

thing for our

parents

and us . We cannot spend time with our

parents

. They allow him for

work

outside due to our future but it is our duty we should not live them alone in

life

, mostly on that time when they need more sport from us .

Change preposition

Second

show examples

second

if we go for

study

then

for some

parents

not

Change the verb form

do not

did not

show examples

afford costs of living outside and fees of large universities due to financial weakness . Some

parents

allow after arguments from our child but it

give

Change the verb form

gives

show examples

more financial burden in

todays

Correct your spelling

today's

time . On the one hand, if we talk about

work

for teenagers

then

it is beneficial for

Add an article

the youngster

a youngster

show examples

youngster

Fix the agreement mistake

youngsters

show examples

, they go to

deveolped

Correct your spelling

developed

cities

, it helps to

deveop

Correct your spelling

develop

better their skills . Because in urban

areas

they face more

compitition

Correct your spelling

competition

due to many talented

people

are come there for become

succesfull

Correct your spelling

successful

life

. Yong

people

get tough

compitition

Correct your spelling

competition

only in large

compnies

Correct your spelling

companies

and

mostly

Replace the word

most

show examples

large companies have in big

deveolped

Correct your spelling

developed

cities

On the other hand

studing

Correct your spelling

studying

in big

cities

mostly

Replace the word

most

show examples

people

are educated and

succesfull

Correct your spelling

successful

life

. Which create

very

Correct article usage

a very

show examples

good

enviorment

Correct your spelling

environment

for their

study

and

encourage

Replace the word

encouragement

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

them to

show examples

focus on

study

youngester

Correct your spelling

youngster

youngsters

can

also

learn from

sucessfull

Correct your spelling

successful

people

how

the

Correct your spelling

they

show examples

make plans for their own

succes

Correct your spelling

success

and how they become independent early in

life

. In conclusion, there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

some

disadvantage

Fix the agreement mistake

disadvantages

show examples

work

Wrong verb form

working

show examples

and

study

Wrong verb form

studying

show examples

deveoped

Correct your spelling

developed

urban

areas

but because of

Correct your spelling

competition

compitition

Correct article usage

the compitition

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

cities

and good educated

people

enviorment

Correct your spelling

environment

make young

people

`s future better,

therefore

Change the capitalization

show examples

think it is better to get

education

Correct article usage

an education

show examples

and job in

cities

Submitted by deepammol on Thu Jan 06 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

318 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Migration
Urbanization
Educational institutions
Job prospects
Wages
Economic growth
Cultural exchange
Overpopulation
Cost of living
Rural depopulation
Social isolation
Traditional values
Personal growth
Recreational activities

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Impacts of technology on education and learning. what are the positive and negative side of this linking
In these recent decades we are going further and further in technology and linking every subject with it to bring new methods to the society. Education is also one of the subjects that connected with technology and now it's getting more effective. Nowadays the combination of technology with education is bringing new affordable tools for learning. Thanks to the technology, there are tons of e-books and virtual courses on the internet that everyone can use in order to persue their educational desires. Beside the accessablity that gets smoother everyday, the affordability of online methods is also one of the other benefits of connection of education to the technology. With new technologies no one can say that they don't have the oppurtinity of learning and this makes a more knowledgeable and skilled community.
5
band
In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays, people store knowledge on the Internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In today's modern society, most information and knowledge are easily found on the internet. It is truly much more convenient compared to paper-based sources. However, the overall impact has been tremendously negative.
4.5
band
Earlier technological developments brought more benefits and changed the life of ordinary people more than recent developments ever will. To what extent do you agree of disagree?
There is an ongoing debate regarding which techology is best. A majority of people believe that the technological developments which had happened in the past had changed the life of common individuals and had numerous merits compared to recent developments and the new technology will be inferior to the past 's. However I completely oppose this view and my stance is discussed in the following paragraphs.
6.5
band
Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by private companies rather than governments. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
It is widely believed that scientific research should be conducted and managed by private corporations instead of governments. Personally, I strongly believe that the benefits of this approach outweigh the disadvantages for several reasons.
8
band
More and more people nowadays are learning on the Internet of going to class. What are the advantages of learning online? Do you think online learning can totally replace the classroom learning?
Since the Covid-19 era, many daily activities have changed drastically, and the learning experience is not an exception, as someone who has experienced first-hand all types of classroom environments: the completely offline before Covid, the remote-only during. and the hybrid format afterwards, Although I do not agree that classrooms will be substituted for online platforms, as it absolutely has some drawbacks, I can certainly advocate that hybrid learning will continue to be a game-changer in the education sector as the benefits of merging the two learning experiences outweigh the shortcomings.

Many young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to study or work in the cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Impacts of technology on education and learning. what are the positive and negative side of this linking

In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays, people store knowledge on the Internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Earlier technological developments brought more benefits and changed the life of ordinary people more than recent developments ever will. To what extent do you agree of disagree?

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by private companies rather than governments. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

More and more people nowadays are learning on the Internet of going to class. What are the advantages of learning online? Do you think online learning can totally replace the classroom learning?