One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing . Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#consequences #care #people #life #expectancy #development

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In the

last

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decades, medicine and treatment technologies have been rising and the technologies support a long

life

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for

people

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. In fact, there are some advantages to human

life

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on the other hand

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this

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long

life

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has some disadvantages. I believe

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apply

show examples

this

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treatment and medicine have a gorgeous effect on the human world. In

this

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essay, I would like to explain the good side and bad sides of medical care. Some technological improvement has shown us that the medical technologies have risen and it's support to living

time

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people

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also

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this

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time

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has risen day by day and

people

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could be happy.

Firstly

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, because of a long lifetime,

people

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can spend more

time

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with their family, relatives or

people

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who like them.

In addition

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, when they spend

time

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with your loved ones, they will be happy.

Finally

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people

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can learn more information as science, religion, philosophy etc. in

this

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long

time

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and they will be wise and they could speak about wisdom. For

this

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reason, humanity could rise about science.

For instance

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, if a scientist who has a brilliant brain will survive a long

time

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, he can invent more devices that can help persons more. I support,

this

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technological rising will be

made

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make

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us better. On the other,

this

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big lifetime has some bad effect on our world. In nature, some

people

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should die and some

people

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should be burned. If some

people

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don't die in normal human

life

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, the world will be crowded, so we will finish the source of the meet and water.

However

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, we can solve

this

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problem with technology and we can put some limits on reproduction like in China. In conclusion, technological improvement has some dangerous way and it is the same for medicine, but these developments have a lot of advantages as long and healthy

life

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. In my opinion, we can fix some problems with science, so we should continue inventing some things.

Submitted by emrahipek25 on Thu Jan 13 2022

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

320 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

life expectancy
elderly population
health care systems
pension funds
extended family relationships
quality of life
aging population
economic growth
volunteer work
expertise
financial planning
retirement
age-related diseases
medical research
healthier lifestyles

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One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing . Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some w ay Why is this? do you think it is a positive or a negative development?