IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Young people are often influenced by their peers. Do the advantages of peer pressure outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #peers #peer #pressure
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is undeniable that
youngsters
Use synonyms
 are often encouraged and influenced by the same age group of
people
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 trend has some disadvantages like a distraction from the
goals
Use synonyms
 and an attraction to bad
habits
Use synonyms
, I believe that the benefits that get from
peer
Use synonyms
pressure
Use synonyms
 clearly outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, there are some disadvantages that young
people
Use synonyms
 can face by getting influenced by their peers.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, it could be argued that
youngsters
Use synonyms
 can get easily distracted from their
goals
Use synonyms
. Indeed, if
people
Use synonyms
 give more importance to the party or enjoyment
instead
Linking Words
 of study, it will easily affect their concentration and focus from their aim or goal, which might impact their educational performance.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 can destroy their career as well as their future life. Another downside is that young
people
Use synonyms
 can get easily attracted to negative and destructive
habits
Use synonyms
. Substance abuse, excessive smoking, gambling are some examples of
habits
Use synonyms
youngsters
Use synonyms
 follow to impress their friends or get motivated from them, which can bring long-term health issues. Despite these issues, I,
however
Linking Words
, feel that
peer
Use synonyms
pressure
Use synonyms
 is more beneficial to young
people
Use synonyms
. The primary advantage is that
youngsters
Use synonyms
 can get the motivation to achieve their
goals
Use synonyms
 and aims. Certainly, spending more time with dedicated and goal-oriented
people
Use synonyms
 makes it more likely to get influenced to achieve
goals
Use synonyms
 and targets in life.
For example
Linking Words
, students who study with intelligent classmates tend to perform better academically.
In addition
Linking Words
,
peer
Use synonyms
pressure
Use synonyms
 can
also
Linking Words
 help settle down in a new environment. There are many students who travel abroad for study or work and face many issues.
However
Linking Words
, if they spend time with the
people
Use synonyms
 of their age group, they can learn useful things like language or communication, which may help them increase their confidence in life.
Although
Linking Words
 they might
also
Linking Words
 learn bad
habits
Use synonyms
, I would argue that with proper self-control and dedication, young
people
Use synonyms
 can stay away from negative things and adopt some positive
habits
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 I admit that disadvantages like a distraction from
goals
Use synonyms
 and attraction to the negative
habits
Use synonyms
 young
people
Use synonyms
 can get by getting influenced by peers, the advantages they get like motivation and chance to learn some skills are invaluable.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I feel that the benefits of
peer
Use synonyms
pressure
Use synonyms
 clearly outweigh the drawbacks.
Submitted by chavanpranay1994 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: